THE MOST POWERFUL TECHNIQUE TO DESTROY SOCIAL ANXIETY:
Sosa | Mental Strategist@MetaMorpehus
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Oct 09, 2024
~3 min read
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THE MOST POWERFUL TECHNIQUE TO DESTROY SOCIAL ANXIETY:
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By far, this is the greatest piece of advice on social anxiety. It beats any hack or trick.
Teachers from all backgrounds agree on this too (psychologists, spiritual gurus, hypnotherapists, psychiatrists)
So pay attention. Make notes. Bookmark (it's long)
Teachers from all backgrounds agree on this too (psychologists, spiritual gurus, hypnotherapists, psychiatrists)
So pay attention. Make notes. Bookmark (it's long)
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Philosophy
Before we talk practical ‘how to’s’ you need to understand the philosophy behind it.
Let's start with explaining social anxiety;
EVERYONE FEELS ANXIETY & FEAR.
But few have ‘social anxiety’
What’s the difference?
Before we talk practical ‘how to’s’ you need to understand the philosophy behind it.
Let's start with explaining social anxiety;
EVERYONE FEELS ANXIETY & FEAR.
But few have ‘social anxiety’
What’s the difference?
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Social anxiety is a set of behaviours, thoughts, emotions caused by a mental association between speaking to people & fear.
This programming causes inner conflict; layers of shame & self-disgust are built.
Where as anxiety, is a natural feeling
For example:
This programming causes inner conflict; layers of shame & self-disgust are built.
Where as anxiety, is a natural feeling
For example:
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You’d want to be scared if a lion attacked you
Keeps you alert & alive.
Another example:
80% of people feel anxious doing public speaking, even though they don’t feel everyday social anxiety.
Because social anxiety is the reaction.
Keeps you alert & alive.
Another example:
80% of people feel anxious doing public speaking, even though they don’t feel everyday social anxiety.
Because social anxiety is the reaction.
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At the core; you’ve got a physical, adrenaline response to social situations
Why?
Reflect early experiences of being humiliates, rejected or judged.
As a child, these were a life or death situation.
Why?
Reflect early experiences of being humiliates, rejected or judged.
As a child, these were a life or death situation.
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As a kid, your motivation is to survive;
if the tribe or group doesn’t like you…
SURVIVAL IS AT RISK (that's what our small brains think)
That’s why you get the ‘fight or flight’ response.
if the tribe or group doesn’t like you…
SURVIVAL IS AT RISK (that's what our small brains think)
That’s why you get the ‘fight or flight’ response.
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Then you’ve got beliefs,
From past experiences & current anxious feelings, you’ve created belief systems to easily organise your mind:
‘People are mean’
‘Social situations are scary’
‘I get super nervous’
‘I’m bad at speaking to people’
These beliefs hypnotise you.
From past experiences & current anxious feelings, you’ve created belief systems to easily organise your mind:
‘People are mean’
‘Social situations are scary’
‘I get super nervous’
‘I’m bad at speaking to people’
These beliefs hypnotise you.
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It’s how you see the world. It’s how you view situations. It’s how you react to situations:
People become threats.
Banter becomes personal insults.
Speaking to women feels like a prank show.
These beliefs are expressed through loud, negative thoughts.
People become threats.
Banter becomes personal insults.
Speaking to women feels like a prank show.
These beliefs are expressed through loud, negative thoughts.
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Behaviour,
Your actions.
Feeling intense anxiety and listening to negative thoughts easily influences your actions.
Your actions.
Feeling intense anxiety and listening to negative thoughts easily influences your actions.
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That’s why you do lots of avoiding & distracting:
Breaking eye contact.
Avoiding people.
Certain places.
Not speaking up.
Staying quiet & reserved.
Pulling the phone out.
However, you do this to avoid the feeling, not the actual social situation
Breaking eye contact.
Avoiding people.
Certain places.
Not speaking up.
Staying quiet & reserved.
Pulling the phone out.
However, you do this to avoid the feeling, not the actual social situation
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In doing so, you reinforce & validate the emotions & beliefs…
Making them stronger
And have more power over you.
Making them stronger
And have more power over you.
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Identity
Emotions. Beliefs. Actions.
It’s all one huge feedback loop.
You’ve practised it for many years
It’s become automatic
Subconscious
Emotions. Beliefs. Actions.
It’s all one huge feedback loop.
You’ve practised it for many years
It’s become automatic
Subconscious
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Makes it feel like YOU
But, it’s not really you.
Now, imagine these same you…
Except, you had tons of positive early social experiences & beliefs.
You associate speaking to people with fun, excitement, happiness
Using the same feedback loop:
But, it’s not really you.
Now, imagine these same you…
Except, you had tons of positive early social experiences & beliefs.
You associate speaking to people with fun, excitement, happiness
Using the same feedback loop:
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You’d feel great after socializing
Positive beliefs on people
Encourages you to be social
Identity = Social Person
Unfortunately, we can’t go back to the past.
But we can change it now.
This is how:
Positive beliefs on people
Encourages you to be social
Identity = Social Person
Unfortunately, we can’t go back to the past.
But we can change it now.
This is how:
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SOLUTION:
Yes, you can use force & assumption to alter your beliefs.
Yes, you can use exposure therapy & action to decrease social anxiety, get social results & create new positive pathway's.
(Both which I cover in my programme)
Yes, you can use force & assumption to alter your beliefs.
Yes, you can use exposure therapy & action to decrease social anxiety, get social results & create new positive pathway's.
(Both which I cover in my programme)
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However, there will still be that natural urge to retreat back & be an outsider.
That’s why, we aim for the emotions directly.
Cut the legs off.
And the whole building collapses.
That’s why, we aim for the emotions directly.
Cut the legs off.
And the whole building collapses.
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18 Tweets long and haven't got to the practical steps yet;
Basically, it can be used to calm social anxiety in the moment
And let go of deep rooted fears whilst at home
Basically, it can be used to calm social anxiety in the moment
And let go of deep rooted fears whilst at home
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not sure what i wanna do with this
could be a 3-4 part thread...
might just post it on my newsletter
or save it for paid clients, i'll let the people decide
could be a 3-4 part thread...
might just post it on my newsletter
or save it for paid clients, i'll let the people decide
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just in case; I'm greedy and save it for the inner circle
i'll link my stuff
newsletter: metamorpheus.ck.page/products/destr…
i'll link my stuff
newsletter: metamorpheus.ck.page/products/destr…
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coaching: destroysocialanxiety.com