IF YOU'RE DATING MULTIPLE WOMEN, BE TRUTHFUL ABOUT IT There's a...
Master Togan@Getinwithgame
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Nov 08, 2025
~6 min read
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IF YOU'RE DATING MULTIPLE WOMEN, BE TRUTHFUL ABOUT IT
There's a strong temptation for men who see multiple women to fudge the truth about it. But that's bad, for several reasons...
[Thread]
There's a strong temptation for men who see multiple women to fudge the truth about it. But that's bad, for several reasons...
[Thread]
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KEEP IT ON THE DOWN LOW?
Seeing multiple women is a lot more accepted now than it used to be.
Even still, for the most part, things are done "equally."
That is to say, if you can date multiple women, she can date multiple men.
Not every guy likes to share though.
Seeing multiple women is a lot more accepted now than it used to be.
Even still, for the most part, things are done "equally."
That is to say, if you can date multiple women, she can date multiple men.
Not every guy likes to share though.
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I don't like to share. Not with my women.
I'm selfish like that.
However, what I have noticed is that most guys in my spot (i.e., who like to sometimes have multiple women, but do not like to share) often lie.
They will tell a girl she's their one and only.
I'm selfish like that.
However, what I have noticed is that most guys in my spot (i.e., who like to sometimes have multiple women, but do not like to share) often lie.
They will tell a girl she's their one and only.
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Then, behind her back, they go running around with other girls.
Not a big problem... until you pass her an STD.
Or she finds some other hussy's bra at the bottom of your sheets.
Or she sees you outside smooching with your mistress.
Not a big problem... until you pass her an STD.
Or she finds some other hussy's bra at the bottom of your sheets.
Or she sees you outside smooching with your mistress.
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When that happens, all HECK breaks loose.
You may still end up with the girl.
I'll tell you a big secret: if you get caught cheating and you FOLD... as in, get totally weak and plead to make up... usually that's IT...
You may still end up with the girl.
I'll tell you a big secret: if you get caught cheating and you FOLD... as in, get totally weak and plead to make up... usually that's IT...
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However, if you remain calm, and aren't dismissive of her, but handle it like a man, she's going to stay.
I've seen it time and again.
Even still, if she stays, she is not going to be happy.
You are going to have a lot of trust issues with her, for a LONG time.
I've seen it time and again.
Even still, if she stays, she is not going to be happy.
You are going to have a lot of trust issues with her, for a LONG time.
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Those issues will cause her to test you more than she did before, sometimes relentlessly.
For all intents and purposes, it ruins the relationship.
But what if that didn't have to happen?
What if there was a way to avoid it entirely?
For all intents and purposes, it ruins the relationship.
But what if that didn't have to happen?
What if there was a way to avoid it entirely?
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TELL HER THE TRUTH
I'm lucky, because the first mentor I ever had in dating told me to tell women I wasn't exclusive.
He further trained me to treat them LIKE a girlfriend, and that if you treated a girl LIKE a girlfriend, she would slip into that role…
I'm lucky, because the first mentor I ever had in dating told me to tell women I wasn't exclusive.
He further trained me to treat them LIKE a girlfriend, and that if you treated a girl LIKE a girlfriend, she would slip into that role…
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I stuck fast to the policy of being forthright with girlfriends after that.
I wasn't going to lie and pretend I was exclusive when I wasn't.
I'd just be honest.
And something funny happened:
I wasn't going to lie and pretend I was exclusive when I wasn't.
I'd just be honest.
And something funny happened:
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No matter how much women protested it at first, just like that mentor said, they'd eventually settle into it.
So long as you treat her right, a woman can make peace with nearly ANYTHING.
You don't realize how remarkably flexible women are until you experience.
So long as you treat her right, a woman can make peace with nearly ANYTHING.
You don't realize how remarkably flexible women are until you experience.
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It also makes you realize that the ONLY thing a woman cares about is how strong you are as a man and how you treat her.
If you seem like a strong man and you treat her the way she wants/needs a man to, nothing else matters.
If you seem like a strong man and you treat her the way she wants/needs a man to, nothing else matters.
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People battering your reputation? If you're a strong dude, you'll handle it, and she'll keep her respect for you.
You're running around with other women, but it never impacts the way you treat her? She'll only grouse if she worries it'll affect her status or treatment.
You're running around with other women, but it never impacts the way you treat her? She'll only grouse if she worries it'll affect her status or treatment.
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All the lying men do... and the sneaking around... out of FEAR...
It's misguided.
It misunderstands the nature of women.
Women are not like men.
They're different.
They want to feel you're strong.
And they want to feel you treat them how they ought to be treated.
It's misguided.
It misunderstands the nature of women.
Women are not like men.
They're different.
They want to feel you're strong.
And they want to feel you treat them how they ought to be treated.
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A man who lies isn't either; he's scared and weak, and he's hiding things from them, which means they're probably not being treated properly.
A man who tells the truth though?
He is (as much as he ever can be with women) in the clear.
A man who tells the truth though?
He is (as much as he ever can be with women) in the clear.
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WHAT IF YOU RUN INTO ANOTHER GIRL?
What if you're out with one girl and you run into another?
Well, if you're doing FWBs, you can establish "pecking orders."
That is where you let your casual girlfriends know there is a more serious girlfriend, whom you've been with longer.
What if you're out with one girl and you run into another?
Well, if you're doing FWBs, you can establish "pecking orders."
That is where you let your casual girlfriends know there is a more serious girlfriend, whom you've been with longer.
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You can even discuss it with them: "If we run into each other and I'm with her, I won't say anything to you, out of respect to her."
Then make sure they understand and agree.
Then make sure they understand and agree.
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If you DO actually see them while out with a primary girlfriend, they are still going to get hurt, even if they stay chill.
You'll just have to deal with that the next time you see them.
You'll just have to deal with that the next time you see them.
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What if you haven't set things up properly, and the girls confront each other and compete for you right in front of you?
Well, your job is to stay calm.
Well, your job is to stay calm.
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If you act afraid or nervous or like you've been caught red handed, like a bloodhound women will smell the fear.
At that point, your goose is cooked.
Get ready for meltdowns.
At that point, your goose is cooked.
Get ready for meltdowns.
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If you calmly introduce them: "Sasha, this is my friend Amy. Amy, Sasha," and you stay cool, watch how catty they get.
Both girls will test you on it later.
Again, if you stay relaxed, they will only become MORE attracted to you.
Both girls will test you on it later.
Again, if you stay relaxed, they will only become MORE attracted to you.
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That said, if you're going to date multiple girls, maybe it makes sense not to hang out with one of them in a part of town the other frequents?
That's always the smarter path, IMO.
That's always the smarter path, IMO.
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While one girl spying you with another can drive up your attractiveness to her, it's also more chaos than you'll normally want to deal with.
It's best AVOIDED if you can.
It's best AVOIDED if you can.
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HONESTY'S THE POLICY
Here's the thing about honesty:
It is HARDER at the beginning.
Because then you have to deal with resistance and pushback.
But it is much EASIER when problems happen... because the trust is still there, and nothing truly unexpected occurs.
Here's the thing about honesty:
It is HARDER at the beginning.
Because then you have to deal with resistance and pushback.
But it is much EASIER when problems happen... because the trust is still there, and nothing truly unexpected occurs.
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When you LIE, it is easier at the beginning.
Then it just gets harder and harder as you go.
You have to come up with reasons why she can't see your phone, or why you won't go to a certain part of town with her.
Then it just gets harder and harder as you go.
You have to come up with reasons why she can't see your phone, or why you won't go to a certain part of town with her.
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You have to get her to understand why she's not allowed over to your place on certain nights
Or why you stop responding to messages sometimes for hours or a day at a time
And when something goes wrong, you have a TOTAL MELTDOWN on your hands because it's so unexpected for her.
Or why you stop responding to messages sometimes for hours or a day at a time
And when something goes wrong, you have a TOTAL MELTDOWN on your hands because it's so unexpected for her.
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Purely as a man, as a responsible human being, it is also just the better thing to do to be straightforward with people, too.
You can stretch the truth in flirtation ("It's not lying; it's flirting").
Yet in your relationships, I suggest you keep it honest.
You can stretch the truth in flirtation ("It's not lying; it's flirting").
Yet in your relationships, I suggest you keep it honest.
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You'll discover as you do so that not only does it make things much easier for you as the relationship progresses...
but you'll be surprised at the things you learn about female nature (and what women will and won't accept) along the way.
but you'll be surprised at the things you learn about female nature (and what women will and won't accept) along the way.
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