(cw: dubcon, mpreg, memory loss) foxxian escapes lotus pier during...
Elissa 𼎠| yiling laozu apologist@cerbykerby
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Nov 29, 2024
~62 min read
1
(cw: dubcon, mpreg, memory loss)
foxxian escapes lotus pier during a heat and mates with a stranger on the streets in a fit of lust. when he finally returns home, he's already preggie đđđ
to make matters worse, he can't remember who the stranger is, or what they look like.
foxxian escapes lotus pier during a heat and mates with a stranger on the streets in a fit of lust. when he finally returns home, he's already preggie đđđ
to make matters worse, he can't remember who the stranger is, or what they look like.
2
madam yu is FURIOUS. it's bad enough that she has been raising someone else's child for the past 15 years; there is no way she is going to raise foxxian's child either.
she nearly throws foxxian out. what a disgrace; he doesn't even know who the father is. it could be anyone.
she nearly throws foxxian out. what a disgrace; he doesn't even know who the father is. it could be anyone.
3
in the end, foxxian is not thrown outâbut he is locked away in his room, where the sight of him and his growing belly won't disgrace the jiang snake clan.
when asked how it happened, foxxian isn't sure; he remembers running, his body itching with need from his heat.
when asked how it happened, foxxian isn't sure; he remembers running, his body itching with need from his heat.
4
then, when night fell, he didn't know how to get backâand he knew not to book a room at an inn while he was in this state.
so he did the sensible thing and settled with locating a cave to rest in for the night. how was he supposed to know that the cave was occupied?
so he did the sensible thing and settled with locating a cave to rest in for the night. how was he supposed to know that the cave was occupied?
5
foxxian doesn't remember who was in the cave. he just remembers warmth, the scent of sandalwood, big hands, a gentle voiceâthen many, many hours of clambering over his new companion and straddling them, or being pinned down and taken until his voice grew hoarse.
6
so. he doesn't know what his own children look like. he knows their father was human when they coupled, but he doesn't know if their father /is/ human. foxxian's poor memory doesn't allow him even a hint of what his one-night stand looked like.
7
no matter. even if foxxian knows who the father is, there is no guarantee that they would want anything to do with foxxian or their kits. what matters is that they're his; that will never change. who their father is is irrelevant to how much foxxian loves his babies.
8
jyl initially is disappointed in foxxian. heats are unpredictableâespecially for foxes, who are very rareâbut mating with a random stranger is reckless, even for foxxian. he could have gotten hurt.
but she still supports him. she even speculates on the kits' appearance with him.
but she still supports him. she even speculates on the kits' appearance with him.
9
regardless of what their father is, surely the kits will be mostly, if not completely, foxes? anyhow, the jiang snake clan quietly anticipate the arrival of a few roly-poly fox kits in about six more months' time.
in four months, foxxian goes into labor.
in four months, foxxian goes into labor.
10
foxxian is in a panic. jyl is having a full meltdown. jc is choking the physician, demanding answers. it's too soon for a birth. no baby will survive this early. the preparations for the nursery aren't even done yet. nobody is ready.
then an entire EGG slides out of foxxian.
then an entire EGG slides out of foxxian.
11
jyl: đ¤¨
jc: đ¤¨đ¤¨???
foxxian: đ¤¨đ¤¨đ¤¨ ?!!?!?!?!?!!??!?!?!?!!!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!??
jc: đ¤¨đ¤¨???
foxxian: đ¤¨đ¤¨đ¤¨ ?!!?!?!?!?!!??!?!?!?!!!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!??
12
so. no fox kits. mammals don't hatch out of eggs.
as jyl is processing all of this, foxxian pushes out two more eggs. jc is losing his whole goddamn mind because he has psyched himself into thinking that foxxian mated with a turtle, or a bird, or maybe even a crocodile??
as jyl is processing all of this, foxxian pushes out two more eggs. jc is losing his whole goddamn mind because he has psyched himself into thinking that foxxian mated with a turtle, or a bird, or maybe even a crocodile??
13
foxxian: I DIDN'T FUCK A CROCODILE U DUMBASS
jc: HOW DO U KNOW. U DON'T EVEN REMEMBER WHO THEY ARE.
foxxian: đ¤¨
foxxian: đ¤
foxxian: damn, you could be right đđđ
jc: HOW DO U KNOW. U DON'T EVEN REMEMBER WHO THEY ARE.
foxxian: đ¤¨
foxxian: đ¤
foxxian: damn, you could be right đđđ
14
yet another waiting game begins; this time, to see what hatches out of those eggs.
foxxian isn't sure what to do. eggs should be incubated, he thinks, but he doesn't trust himself to lie on top of his eggs and not break them. so he makes a nest for them by the fire.
foxxian isn't sure what to do. eggs should be incubated, he thinks, but he doesn't trust himself to lie on top of his eggs and not break them. so he makes a nest for them by the fire.
15
the jiang siblings try everything to gain more clues as to what could be inside those eggs; they shine light through, gently rap their knuckles against the shell, and even inspect the eggshells of other creatures to see if there are any similarities.
nothing.
nothing.
16
then, one day, in the middle of the night, the eggs start hatching.
foxxian and his siblings watch in bleary anticipation and anxiety. it's finally happening. they're going to see what foxxian's children are.
the eggshells fall apart to revealâ
âthey're not sure what it is.
foxxian and his siblings watch in bleary anticipation and anxiety. it's finally happening. they're going to see what foxxian's children are.
the eggshells fall apart to revealâ
âthey're not sure what it is.
17
it's wet, that's for sureâstill soaked in egg liquid. it has four paws and a tail. it stumbles to the floor and begins calling out in the most pitiful tiny voice.
foxxian's instincts take over. he trots forward, whining in response, and begins licking his baby clean.
foxxian's instincts take over. he trots forward, whining in response, and begins licking his baby clean.
18
the little thing is so small, and so helpless. jyl carefully helps dry it with a towel as jc tends to the fire. foxxian curls up around his baby, continuously licking, and showers it with endless nuzzles.
it is quite fluffy when it dries. it's very cute.
it is quite fluffy when it dries. it's very cute.
19
the other two hatch over the next few days, then there's three fluffy⌠somethings following foxxian around. it's still unclear what they are. they look /almost/ like foxesâone is black, like foxxianâbut they are clearly not foxes. their teeth are sharp, but they don't eat meat.
20
madam yu visits one day. she inspects the babies one by one. foxxian sits and watches in fox form, twitching against the urge to bite her hands whenever the babies cry out from her touch.
(she's not hurting them; they're just dramatic)
(she's not hurting them; they're just dramatic)
21
when she finally returns them to foxxian, she asks, stone-faced, "Any idea what the father is?"
foxxian makes sure his children are securely tucked underneath him before shaking his head. it doesn't matter to him who or what their father is. these are his babies.
foxxian makes sure his children are securely tucked underneath him before shaking his head. it doesn't matter to him who or what their father is. these are his babies.
22
then, one day, foxxian and his siblings discover two alarming hard nubs growing from the eldest baby's head. they notice because the baby is making distressed sounds and trying to rub its head against anything and everything. the skin looks swollen and red around the nubs.
23
foxxian is inconsolable; his poor, poor baby is in pain, and he doesn't know why. the worst case scenario runs through his head; perhaps he and their father were physiologically incompatible. maybe he'd doomed his children to a short life of agony from the very start.
24
jc rolls his eyes and smacks the back of foxxian's head before going to fetch a physician.
25
the physician arrives with jfm and, oddly, madam yu in tow. foxxian hands them his baby. he's trying, and failing, to fight back tears. he fears the worst.
the physician is making odd faces as they inspect the baby. foxxian's lower lip trembles. jyl hugs him in support.
the physician is making odd faces as they inspect the baby. foxxian's lower lip trembles. jyl hugs him in support.
26
after an eternity, the physician returns the baby to foxxian.
foxxian takes the baby into his arm and holds him close. "What's wrong with him?" he chokes.
the physician runs their fingers through their hair and sighs wearily. "Nothing is wrong. He's just growing antlers."
foxxian takes the baby into his arm and holds him close. "What's wrong with him?" he chokes.
the physician runs their fingers through their hair and sighs wearily. "Nothing is wrong. He's just growing antlers."
27
the fear and tension in the room abruptly morphs into confusion. jyl looks lost as she cradles the other two babies in her arms. foxxian's brain has stopped working.
meanwhile, jc's mind is going: fox = mammal but mammal =/= egg but antler = deer and deer = mammal and ???
meanwhile, jc's mind is going: fox = mammal but mammal =/= egg but antler = deer and deer = mammal and ???
28
"I don't understand." foxxian clutches his baby to him. "Why would he be growing antlers?"
the physician gives him a tired, almost sympathetic look. "Young Master Wei, the father of these children wouldn't happen to be a dragon, would they?"
the room goes pin-drop silent.
the physician gives him a tired, almost sympathetic look. "Young Master Wei, the father of these children wouldn't happen to be a dragon, would they?"
the room goes pin-drop silent.
29
the only dragons in existence are from the imperial lan family. their royal blood dates back centuries, and they are very rarely seen anywhere that isn't gusu's skies.
foxxian feels the blood drain from his face. madam yu looks equally pale. jfm might have stopped breathing.
foxxian feels the blood drain from his face. madam yu looks equally pale. jfm might have stopped breathing.
30
as if on cue, the baby in foxxian's arm sneezes with such force that it launches itself into the air. foxxian scrambles to catch it, butâit's not falling. rather, it's flyingâand in a very distinct, dragon-like weaving motion.
jc passes out on the floor.
jc passes out on the floor.
31
the jiang family and foxxian are awkwardly quiet after the physician leaves. jfm won't make eye contact with anyone. jc has woken up, but hasn't peeled himself off of the floor. jyl is trying to coax the eldest fox-dragon baby down from the ceiling.
32
"We need to tell the imperial family," yzy declares.
"No," foxxian protests.
"Do you know how to raise dragons?" she snaps at him. "You can't fly. How will you manage them once they're in the air? It will be worse for all of us if the imperial family find out on their own."
"No," foxxian protests.
"Do you know how to raise dragons?" she snaps at him. "You can't fly. How will you manage them once they're in the air? It will be worse for all of us if the imperial family find out on their own."
33
despite foxxian's pleading, yzy writes to the imperial lan dragon clan. all that's left to do is wait for a reply.
foxxian spends his days curled up with his babies and rubbing their heads, trying to relieve them of the pain and itchiness of their horns growing.
foxxian spends his days curled up with his babies and rubbing their heads, trying to relieve them of the pain and itchiness of their horns growing.
34
"You fucked a dragon," jc says, staring at foxxian.
"The physician could be wrong," foxxian argues. "They could be deer."
"They hatched out of /eggs./" jc's voice goes high-pitched. "And they /fly/."
foxxian scowls and cuddles his babies closer.
"The physician could be wrong," foxxian argues. "They could be deer."
"They hatched out of /eggs./" jc's voice goes high-pitched. "And they /fly/."
foxxian scowls and cuddles his babies closer.
35
a reply to yzy's letter comes in the form of a plain horse carriage that pulls up unannounced to lotus pier. the jiang family are just finishing up supper when a frazzled servant stumbles into the hall to blurt out that emperor lan and his brother have arrived.
36
foxxian immediately leaves, sprinting away. yzy is just about to yell at him to come back when the hall's doors open.
emperor lan is unearthly beautiful. white and blue imperial robes flow down his body like waterfalls. his crown rests perfectly between silver antlers.
emperor lan is unearthly beautiful. white and blue imperial robes flow down his body like waterfalls. his crown rests perfectly between silver antlers.
37
the jiang clan kneel. "Your subjects greet Your Majesty," yzy says, bowing low. "Forgive us our lack of hospitality. We were not expecting Your Majesty."
emperor lan's smile is gentle. his eyes search each family member. "It is no trouble. Where is the fox?"
emperor lan's smile is gentle. his eyes search each family member. "It is no trouble. Where is the fox?"
38
"Wei Ying is with the children," jfm answers, glancing about nervously. "Your Majesty, we were told the Second Prince accompanied youâŚ"
"Ah." emperor lan chuckles. he doesn't sound amused. "Forgive him. Wangji was impatient, and asked for a servant to lead him to the children."
"Ah." emperor lan chuckles. he doesn't sound amused. "Forgive him. Wangji was impatient, and asked for a servant to lead him to the children."
39
the fox-dragon babies usually nap whenever foxxian goes to have supper with the jiangs, but they are awake now and playing with each other. they roll around on foxxian's bed, chirping and squeaking as they play-wrestle.
the door to foxxian's room opens andâthat's not foxxian.
the door to foxxian's room opens andâthat's not foxxian.
40
"Here you are, Your Highness," the servant stammers as he holds the door open, pressing himself as close to it as possible. "The b-babies. See? They're all healthy."
the babies stare with three pairs of round, wide eyes as a strange man steps into the room.
the babies stare with three pairs of round, wide eyes as a strange man steps into the room.
41
the man isâtall. very tall. and smells very strange. golden eyes stare back at them, unblinkingly, as the man slowly walks forward. a hand reaches out.
the babies panic, splitting up and darting away. the eldest squirms under foxxian's pillows. the middle dives into a dresser.
the babies panic, splitting up and darting away. the eldest squirms under foxxian's pillows. the middle dives into a dresser.
42
the youngestâand plumpestâtries to squeeze under the bed. it doesn't work; he is stuck. his exposed hind legs scrabble uselessly at the floorboards as he makes high-pitched, scared whimpers.
when he feels something touch him, he shrieks as loudly as his little throat can manage.
when he feels something touch him, he shrieks as loudly as his little throat can manage.
43
foxxian knows something has gone terribly wrong when he sees light coming from what is unmistakably his open bedroom door. in two strides, he shifts into his fox formâand just as his front paws touch the ground, he hears one of his babies scream. pure fear takes over.
44
he doesn't give a warning growl; he slams his entire body weight into the intruder and sinks his fangs into the closest limb. the intruder grunts in pain and stumbles, trying to get away. foxxian doesn't let them; he claws at them without mercy and bites, and bites, and bites.
45
(cw: blood)
he's drawing blood; he can taste it, a metallic tang on his tongue. but the intruder doesn't relent. foxxian is forced to let go with a pained yelp when the intruder backs them both up into a wall and nearly crushes foxxian alive.
all the babies are crying, scared.
he's drawing blood; he can taste it, a metallic tang on his tongue. but the intruder doesn't relent. foxxian is forced to let go with a pained yelp when the intruder backs them both up into a wall and nearly crushes foxxian alive.
all the babies are crying, scared.
46
(cw: blood, slight gore? no permanent damage)
the sound of their terrified sobs floods foxxian's veins with adrenaline. with a heave, he bites down onto the intruder's hand, feeling skin and tendon give beneath his teeth, and hauls the intruder out of the bedroom.
the sound of their terrified sobs floods foxxian's veins with adrenaline. with a heave, he bites down onto the intruder's hand, feeling skin and tendon give beneath his teeth, and hauls the intruder out of the bedroom.
47
he feels the hand in his mouth shift between his jaws; soft human skin gives way to hard, cold scales. the clawâit's definitely a claw, nowâcurls around foxxian's lower jaw, talons digging into his chin. furious golden eyes watch him as the intruder's body morphs.
48
before foxxian can react, he's hit with a face full of wind so cold that it almost feels hot. ice promptly forms around his eyes, threatening to freeze his eyelids shut. he's already losing sensation in his jaws from the cold.
he stumbles back, shaking ice off of his face.
he stumbles back, shaking ice off of his face.
49
there is a white dragon in front of him, parts of its scales smeared red with blood that foxxian drew. the dragon stalks around him, never once taking its eyes off of him. its fangs are tipped with frost.
it's not attacking, but it's also not leaving. that is still unacceptable.
it's not attacking, but it's also not leaving. that is still unacceptable.
50
foxxian charges; the dragon opens its jaws and breathes ice on the ground, freezing foxxian's paws in place.
as foxxian struggles to pull free, the dragon turns to look at the bedroom, where the babies are still crying. foxxian considers chewing his own legs off.
as foxxian struggles to pull free, the dragon turns to look at the bedroom, where the babies are still crying. foxxian considers chewing his own legs off.
51
jyl's cry of, "A-Xian!" is a godsend. the jiangs quickly arrive; jc immediately goes about chipping the ice away from foxxian's paws as jyl runs into the bedroom to check on the babies.
there's another person with them, a man in white with a beaded crown.
there's another person with them, a man in white with a beaded crown.
52
the man in white approaches the dragon. his brows furrow together as he takes in the multiple bite wounds that stain white fur and scales. after a few quiet exchanged words, the dragon slowly shifts back into human form.
the former-dragon is a mess. bite marks litter his skin.
the former-dragon is a mess. bite marks litter his skin.
53
yzy storms up to foxxian as jc manages to free one paw.
"Wei Wuxian! Do you have *any* idea what you've done?" her voice is shakingâwhether out of fear or anger is anybody's guess. "That's the Second Prince, Hanguang-Jun. You've spilled imperial blood!"
foxxian ignores her.
"Wei Wuxian! Do you have *any* idea what you've done?" her voice is shakingâwhether out of fear or anger is anybody's guess. "That's the Second Prince, Hanguang-Jun. You've spilled imperial blood!"
foxxian ignores her.
54
as soon as foxxian's feet are free, he limps into his bedroom. the babies are gathered in jyl's lap, but they scramble out to greet him.
foxxian noses each one carefully, checking them for injuries. they're still upset, but they're no longer panicking.
foxxian noses each one carefully, checking them for injuries. they're still upset, but they're no longer panicking.
55
the youngest oneâthe one that was stuck under the bedâpeeks out at the two strangers. surrounded by family and safely by foxxian's side, he summons enough bravery to give a tiny warning growl in their direction. he arches his back almost like an angry cat; his fur sticks out.
56
the emperor laughs, which startles the baby into losing his nerve and burrowing himself back into the safety of foxxian's side.
"Such a brave little one." this time, there is genuine joy in the emperor's smile. "Very much like a dragonâwouldn't you agree, Wangji?"
"Such a brave little one." this time, there is genuine joy in the emperor's smile. "Very much like a dragonâwouldn't you agree, Wangji?"
57
the second prince ignores him, focusing instead on his hand. the servant bandaging it alternates between lamenting the second prince's bloodied jade-like skin and shooting death glares at foxxian.
foxxian snaps his jaws; the servant nearly pulls the bandages too tight.
foxxian snaps his jaws; the servant nearly pulls the bandages too tight.
58
the emperor steps forward. "Young Master Wei," he greets. "May I see the children?"
foxxian has to shift back to human form to answer, "No."
"Wei Wuxian," yzy scolds.
"These are my children," foxxian hisses, ignoring her. "Not yours. I don't care if you're father."
foxxian has to shift back to human form to answer, "No."
"Wei Wuxian," yzy scolds.
"These are my children," foxxian hisses, ignoring her. "Not yours. I don't care if you're father."
59
the expression on the emperor's face somehow changes without showing a different emotion. "Ah. I'm afraid there's a bit of a misunderstanding. This is my first time meeting you."
first time? but then that would meanâ
no.
/no./
foxxian's gaze slowly slides over to dragonji.
first time? but then that would meanâ
no.
/no./
foxxian's gaze slowly slides over to dragonji.
60
hand bandaged and wounds tended to, dragonji glares back at foxxian. "Wei Wuxian, is it?" he sounds cold. "Pleased to make your acquaintance."
"Wish I could say the same," foxxian snarls. "Keep your hands off of my babies."
"They're my children too," dragonji insists.
"Wish I could say the same," foxxian snarls. "Keep your hands off of my babies."
"They're my children too," dragonji insists.
61
foxxian rolls his eyes. "Why? Just because you stuck your dick inside of me?"
dragonji bristles. "Crude," he snaps.
"Not crude enough for your snob ass to *not* fuck, apparently," foxxian mocks.
"Neither was I snobbish enough for you to resist, it seems," dragonji shoots back.
dragonji bristles. "Crude," he snaps.
"Not crude enough for your snob ass to *not* fuck, apparently," foxxian mocks.
"Neither was I snobbish enough for you to resist, it seems," dragonji shoots back.
62
"I do believe it's getting late," the emperor interjects. "We can try again tomorrow, after we have rested."
dragonji doesn't move. "I want to see my children."
"Absolutely not." foxxian sneers. "Not after what you pulled today. You scared *my* babies. Get out of my sight."
dragonji doesn't move. "I want to see my children."
"Absolutely not." foxxian sneers. "Not after what you pulled today. You scared *my* babies. Get out of my sight."
63
that makes dragonji pause. his gaze flits to the fox-dragon babies, who are still huddled against foxxian's side. his throat bobs as he swallows.
"I apologize," he says with a slight bow. "I did not mean to."
he turns and walks back to his brother's side.
"I apologize," he says with a slight bow. "I did not mean to."
he turns and walks back to his brother's side.
64
the jiangs give the lan dragons guest rooms in lotus pier, much to foxxian's dismay. he doesn't sleep at all that night, paranoid that he's going to wake up and find his babies missing.
nothing happens that night, and morning finds foxxian incredibly sleep-deprived and cranky.
nothing happens that night, and morning finds foxxian incredibly sleep-deprived and cranky.
65
a servant bringing foxxian his breakfast tells him, "Madam Yu wants you to allow His Highness to visit his children."
his? HIS? foxxian nearly chucks the food tray at the servant's head. instead, he angrily stuffs his face with food. he's going to need the energy.
his? HIS? foxxian nearly chucks the food tray at the servant's head. instead, he angrily stuffs his face with food. he's going to need the energy.
66
at noon, the same servant comes back to announce dragonji's arrival. when foxxian peeks out from his door, he finds dragonji standing a little ways away, holding what looks like some very high quality silk blankets.
foxxian slams the door shut and leaves him standing there.
foxxian slams the door shut and leaves him standing there.
67
foxxian takes his sweet time nursing his babies and rubbing anti-itch ointment on their head nubs. he also reads to them and plays with them.
when he peeks out at dragonji again, dragonji is still in the same positionâalthough he is clearly straining to hear the babies playing.
when he peeks out at dragonji again, dragonji is still in the same positionâalthough he is clearly straining to hear the babies playing.
68
usually foxxian takes the babies out to play in some fresh air, but not today. he doesn't leave his room for anything; and when the servant comes to bring him his supper, the servant startles to see dragonji still standing outside, holding blankets.
69
"Madam Yu is going to be furious," the servant warns him after setting the food down.
foxxian ignores him. soon, it's almost bedtime. the babies are already tucked in and sound asleep.
foxxian checks outside again; shockingly, dragonji is still there.
foxxian ignores him. soon, it's almost bedtime. the babies are already tucked in and sound asleep.
foxxian checks outside again; shockingly, dragonji is still there.
70
he's still not ready or in the mood to deal with this, but he *is* exhausted, and⌠there are nice blankets being offered.
so he shifts into fox form and trots out. without acknowledging dragonji, he yanks the topmost folded blanket off of the pile and takes it back to his room.
so he shifts into fox form and trots out. without acknowledging dragonji, he yanks the topmost folded blanket off of the pile and takes it back to his room.
71
when he comes back to grab another one, dragonji takes a step after him when he turns around.
the blanket in his mouth muffles foxxian's growl somewhat, but dragonji stops upon hearing it, and foxxian returns to his room alone with his silky soft prize.
the blanket in his mouth muffles foxxian's growl somewhat, but dragonji stops upon hearing it, and foxxian returns to his room alone with his silky soft prize.
72
when foxxian grabs the last blanket, dragonji says, "May I see them?"
foxxian ignores him and continues trotting back to his room.
"I won't touch them or disturb their rest," dragonji calls after him. "I just wish to see them. Please."
foxxian stops. ugh. curse that 'please'.
foxxian ignores him and continues trotting back to his room.
"I won't touch them or disturb their rest," dragonji calls after him. "I just wish to see them. Please."
foxxian stops. ugh. curse that 'please'.
73
he trots all the way to his bedroom door, just to see if dragonji intends to push the issue. when he's inside the room, he turns around to look.
dragonji is no longer looking at him; instead, he's staring down at his boots. he doesn't say a single word.
ugh. this is the worst.
dragonji is no longer looking at him; instead, he's staring down at his boots. he doesn't say a single word.
ugh. this is the worst.
74
foxxian goes to place the blanket on the bed, then returns to the door. dragonji is already walking away.
a single yip is enough to catch his attention. when dragonji looks at him, foxxian jerks his head towards the interior of the room in a 'come in' motion.
a single yip is enough to catch his attention. when dragonji looks at him, foxxian jerks his head towards the interior of the room in a 'come in' motion.
75
dragonji is almost too big for foxxian's bedroom. he walks around slowly, but he's in constant danger of bumping into things. when he looks at the three babies tucked into foxxian's bed, his gaze goes soft.
foxxian hops onto the bed and crouches next to his babies, just in case.
foxxian hops onto the bed and crouches next to his babies, just in case.
76
dragonji doesn't make a single noise; foxxian isn't even sure if he's breathing, but he stays there for a long time, just looking at their children.
one of their babies kicks in their sleep. dragonji's throat moves like he wants to speak, but he stays silent.
one of their babies kicks in their sleep. dragonji's throat moves like he wants to speak, but he stays silent.
77
when foxxian starts to grow sleepy, he chases dragonji out by lightly baring his teeth. dragonji leaves without protest, although he looks back one last time at the doorway.
foxxian sleeps well that night, buried amongst silks and with his babies safe and warm.
foxxian sleeps well that night, buried amongst silks and with his babies safe and warm.
78
dragonji returns the next day, patiently waiting outside with what looks like filleted fish in a basket.
foxxian is tempted to make him stand there for an entire day again, but then the fish would surely spoil by nighttime. foxxian is many things but he is not wasteful.
foxxian is tempted to make him stand there for an entire day again, but then the fish would surely spoil by nighttime. foxxian is many things but he is not wasteful.
79
so he goes outside in the morning in fox form, snatches the fish fillets from the basket, and horks them down his throat at lightning speed before darting back into his room.
the look on dragonji's face is /priceless/, but he briefly leaves in the afternoon to get more fish.
the look on dragonji's face is /priceless/, but he briefly leaves in the afternoon to get more fish.
80
the next day, foxxian decides that the children can play outside in dragonji's view. dragonji may not approach them, but he may look. no touch. only look.
until foxxian takes his eyes off of his youngest for 0.0001 second and the chubby baby toddles its way to dragonji.
until foxxian takes his eyes off of his youngest for 0.0001 second and the chubby baby toddles its way to dragonji.
81
the baby is familiar with the concept of 'stranger danger', and he knows that dragonji did not used to be there. yeah he received quite the fright a few days ago, but a few days ago were an eternity for a baby such as he. now he is older! and braver! AND HE WILL DEFEND HIS MAMA.
82
meanwhile, dragonji is⌠not sure what to do about this small, hissy fox-dragon baby. the baby is all poofed out, fur standing on end, and the force of every yip he lets out makes him bounce a little on his paws.
dragonji sends foxxian alarmed looks as the baby attacks his boot.
dragonji sends foxxian alarmed looks as the baby attacks his boot.
83
foxxian is also mildly alarmed, but⌠dragonji isn't trying to touch the baby or pick him up and run away with him, so foxxian just stays on alert.
meanwhile, the baby is trying his best to growl and be intimidating as he attacks the hem of dragonji's robe.
meanwhile, the baby is trying his best to growl and be intimidating as he attacks the hem of dragonji's robe.
84
alas, he is but a baby. he tires easily, and his head nubs are so *itchy*. eventually he stops trying to thrash his father around and ends up mostly using dragonji's leg as a head scratcher.
slowly, dragonji lowers himself until he's squatting, watching foxxian the entire time.
slowly, dragonji lowers himself until he's squatting, watching foxxian the entire time.
85
the baby isn't paying attention; he is too busy rubbing his head against dragonji's leg. when dragonji makes a clicking noise in his throat, the baby looks up and startles at how close he is.
he almost runs away, but no! he is brave. he will stand his ground! he will⌠he willâŚ
he almost runs away, but no! he is brave. he will stand his ground! he will⌠he willâŚ
86
he goes back to using dragonji's ankle to scratch the top of his head.
87
dragonji slowly relaxes his body, muscle by muscle. he reaches down and carefully pets his son, fingers lightly trailing over soft baby fur. all the while, he glances at foxxian to make sure he's not overstepping.
the tip of foxxian's tail is twitching, but so far, so good.
the tip of foxxian's tail is twitching, but so far, so good.
88
very carefully, dragonji uses his finger to gently lift his baby's chin up. the baby squirms, disgruntled by his itch session being interrupted, but tenses up with dragonji exhales softly on his head, encasing his head nubs in ice.
the baby shrieks. foxxian jolts up to his feet.
the baby shrieks. foxxian jolts up to his feet.
89
for a moment, neither parent dares to breathe. both of them stare at the little baby, whoâupon realizing that his head nubs are no longer itchyâis⌠actually rather quick to calm down.
free from itchy, and possibly just a bit confused, the baby rejoins his siblings for playtime.
free from itchy, and possibly just a bit confused, the baby rejoins his siblings for playtime.
90
foxxian slumps back to the ground and rests his head on his paws as he watches the children swarm around the youngest, immediately curious about the Cold Thing on his head.
so. the good news is that the dragons have a natural remedy for painful, itchy antler growth.
so. the good news is that the dragons have a natural remedy for painful, itchy antler growth.
91
the bad news is that babies are curious, and it takes all of about fifteen seconds, a few curious licks, and the other two are trying to fit their youngest sibling's ice hat in their mouths.
the youngest does not appreciate his head being consumed, and he's very vocal about it.
the youngest does not appreciate his head being consumed, and he's very vocal about it.
92
with two fox-dragon babies licking away at it, it doesn't take long for the ice hat to melt. that doesn't stop the two siblings from continuing to lick and nibble their youngest's head.
at one point, the youngest just. gives up and lets them gnaw on his head. it helps the itch.
at one point, the youngest just. gives up and lets them gnaw on his head. it helps the itch.
93
eventually, foxxian picks up his babies one by one by the scruff, drops them at dragonji's feet, and stares at him until he encases all of their head nubs in ice.
which just results in the babies trying to eat each other's heads, so dragonji has to make ice for them to chew.
which just results in the babies trying to eat each other's heads, so dragonji has to make ice for them to chew.
94
I GOT FANART!! THANK YOU @/Kookie_06!!! đĽşđĽşđđ LOOK AT THE BABIES!!!
x.com/marvlous_melodâŚ
x.com/marvlous_melodâŚ
95
((also, link back to the start of the thread:
x.com/cerbykerby/staâŚ
x.com/cerbykerby/staâŚ
96
days go by like this; foxxian gets up, takes care of the babies, and brings them outside to meet with dragonji. dragonji always brings some sort of offering: food, clothes, etc.
one day, dragonji brings golden bracelets.
one day, dragonji brings golden bracelets.
97
the babies are getting used to himâespecially since they now associate him with comfort. the eldest and the middle babies' horns have broken through, so they no longer need the ice hats for relief.
doesn't stop them from demandingly headbutting dragonji in the mouth though.
doesn't stop them from demandingly headbutting dragonji in the mouth though.
98
foxxian's suspicions are immediately raised when dragonji approaches with a box of some sort. past offerings have always been uncovered, so that foxxian may know the contents. this is covered. he doesn't like that.
the babies dart out, squeaking, to greet their father.
the babies dart out, squeaking, to greet their father.
99
dragonji makes clicking noises in his throat as his usual greeting, and gets a reply as all three babies repeat the noise back to him. he kneels down to be closer to his children.
the youngest immediately tries to headbutt his mouth, demanding more ice.
the youngest immediately tries to headbutt his mouth, demanding more ice.
100
dragonji patiently keeps his head tilted back as he slides the box towards foxxian and removes the lid. then he breathes out ice for their children to play with.
foxxian gets to his paws from his resting spot by his bedroom door and warily sneaks forward, sniffing at the box.
foxxian gets to his paws from his resting spot by his bedroom door and warily sneaks forward, sniffing at the box.
101
once he's close enough, he stops.
inside the box lie two beautifully-crafted gold bracelets. on one, the gold parts coilâprotectively, almostâaround gemstones that match the fox-dragon babies' fur colors.
on the other, the gold cradle gemstones of two colors: red and blue.
inside the box lie two beautifully-crafted gold bracelets. on one, the gold parts coilâprotectively, almostâaround gemstones that match the fox-dragon babies' fur colors.
on the other, the gold cradle gemstones of two colors: red and blue.
102
foxxian is not blind, and he knows dragonji isn't, either. the choice of these colors was deliberate.
with a huff, he picks up the bracelet with red and blue gems. unceremoniously, he tosses it aside; it raises a small dirt puff when it hits the ground and rolls away.
with a huff, he picks up the bracelet with red and blue gems. unceremoniously, he tosses it aside; it raises a small dirt puff when it hits the ground and rolls away.
103
the children see a Shiny Moving Thing and chase after it, squeaking and pushing each other to try and reach the bracelet first.
foxxian sneaks dragonji a glance; he is watching their children, his face as neutral as ever.
hm. maybe that bracelet hadn't meant anything special.
foxxian sneaks dragonji a glance; he is watching their children, his face as neutral as ever.
hm. maybe that bracelet hadn't meant anything special.
104
the day goes by. dragonji nuzzles their children goodbye before gently nudging them back to foxxian. foxxian shifts to human form and puts them to bed, then goes to properly inspect the one bracelet he took.
it really is quite pretty. the gem colors match the babies well.
it really is quite pretty. the gem colors match the babies well.
105
he slips the bracelet onto his wrist and admires it. being a single parent is tiring, and he so rarely has time for himself anymore. this little bit of self-indulgence is⌠nice, actually.
he puts the bracelet away in his dresser, for safekeeping.
he puts the bracelet away in his dresser, for safekeeping.
106
the next morning, he's summoned to lotus pier's main hall.
"Yinzhu reported that Hanguang-Jun brought betrothal gifts on his usual visit to you and the children yesterday," madam yu says with a sharp gleam in her eyes. "Did you accept?"
"Yinzhu reported that Hanguang-Jun brought betrothal gifts on his usual visit to you and the children yesterday," madam yu says with a sharp gleam in her eyes. "Did you accept?"
107
foxxian's heart drops to the pits of his stomach. the bracelet. he should have known something was wrong the moment dragonji gave him something that was covered and in a box.
"You would do well to accept," yzy says, a warning in her gaze, "for the children's sake."
"You would do well to accept," yzy says, a warning in her gaze, "for the children's sake."
108
"The children are happy here," foxxian grits out.
"Don't be absurd," yzy snaps. "Here is an opportunity to make sure you and your children will be legitimized and taken care of. The Cloud Recesses is the dragons' ancestral home. Do not deny your children their birthright."
"Don't be absurd," yzy snaps. "Here is an opportunity to make sure you and your children will be legitimized and taken care of. The Cloud Recesses is the dragons' ancestral home. Do not deny your children their birthright."
109
foxxian almost can't breathe. his wrist feels itchy where he had worn the bracelet last night; he wants to scrub at it until his skin turns raw. he wishes he could turn back time and fling both bracelets back at dragonjiâor better yet, not touch them in the first place.
110
ignoring yzy's demands for him to come back, he turns and storms back to his room. it's still early in the morning, so the babies should still be asleep in foxxian's bedroom.
as expected, dragonji is already waiting outside. when he sees foxxianâin human formâhis eyes widen.
as expected, dragonji is already waiting outside. when he sees foxxianâin human formâhis eyes widen.
111
foxxian has never held so much of dragonji's attention beforeâthen again, they have never been alone without the babies. the way dragonji looks at him makes foxxian's insides twist. his eyes are a deep shade of gold.
gold.
the bracelet.
foxxian slaps him across the face.
gold.
the bracelet.
foxxian slaps him across the face.
112
"Your Highness truly knows how to charm your way into someone's heart," foxxian forces a disbelieving laugh. "Do you think that I belong to you just because I bore your children? That I would happily leave my home here and go with you to Gusu just because we fucked once?"
113
dragonji slowly turns his head back. he doesn't meet foxxian's eyes. "I never presumed as such."
foxxian nearly slaps him again. "And now you're a liar as well. Do you know what Madam Yu called me for? One of her handservants saw you bringing *betrothal gifts* to me."
foxxian nearly slaps him again. "And now you're a liar as well. Do you know what Madam Yu called me for? One of her handservants saw you bringing *betrothal gifts* to me."
114
"You have a lot of nerve," foxxian continues, "giving me gifts every day, lulling me into accepting each one, and then sneaking in betrothal gift when I didn't know better. Did you honestly believe I would take this lying down?"
dragonji opens his mouth as if to interject.
dragonji opens his mouth as if to interject.
115
Let me make one thing clear, right now." foxxian jabs his finger against dragonji's chest. "I do not share your customs. I do not recognize this betrothalânot now, not ever. I will never be yours. Do I make myself clear?"
dragonji turns his head away. "There is no betrothal."
dragonji turns his head away. "There is no betrothal."
116
the next litany of insults dies on foxxian's tongue. he hadn't expected dragonji to give in so easily. "What?"
dragonji still isn't looking at him. "Your Madam Yu is mistaken. There were never any betrothal gifts."
"What?" foxxian repeats. chokes. "Butâthe braceletâ"
dragonji still isn't looking at him. "Your Madam Yu is mistaken. There were never any betrothal gifts."
"What?" foxxian repeats. chokes. "Butâthe braceletâ"
117
"A gesture of gratitude." dragonji sounds eerily calm. "You carried our children by yourself. Everything given to you before was to help you take care of them. The bracelets were for you alone."
"But theâ" foxxian blinks. takes a breath, "âthe gems. Their colors. They matchâus."
"But theâ" foxxian blinks. takes a breath, "âthe gems. Their colors. They matchâus."
118
dragonji stays silent for a long time. "So that you may keep our children close to you," he explains. "As for the other braceletâa promise that I will always been there if you need me."
he could be lyingâit would make sense. but foxxian can hear it in his voice; he is not lying.
he could be lyingâit would make sense. but foxxian can hear it in his voice; he is not lying.
119
"But I've overstepped." dragonji backs up slowly, eyes dull. "My apologies. It will not happen again."
foxxian nearly reaches for him. "Where are you going? Our children haven'tâ"
"I will return in the afternoon to see them," dragonji explains. "Now is inconvenient for you."
foxxian nearly reaches for him. "Where are you going? Our children haven'tâ"
"I will return in the afternoon to see them," dragonji explains. "Now is inconvenient for you."
120
when foxxian trudges back to his room and opens the door, he finds the babies huddled together on the bed, looking at him with wide eyes.
foxxian's heart sinks. "Hello, um," he steps into the room. "You heard that, didn't you?"
the babies peel off of each other to go greet him.
foxxian's heart sinks. "Hello, um," he steps into the room. "You heard that, didn't you?"
the babies peel off of each other to go greet him.
121
they cuddle against foxxian, purring. the littlest one tumbles off of the bed and waddles out the door, making the same greeting-clicking sound in his throat that dragonji always makes upon seeing them each day.
foxxian's heart sinks further when the baby looks around, confused.
foxxian's heart sinks further when the baby looks around, confused.
122
the other two scramble to join him, their excitement turning into confusion when they find themselves alone. three little throats make the same clicking sound, calling out, searching.
"Oh," foxxian's breath shudders. "I'm sorry, babies. Baba isâbusy. He'll be back in a bit."
"Oh," foxxian's breath shudders. "I'm sorry, babies. Baba isâbusy. He'll be back in a bit."
123
it is difficult to bring them back inside. babies are creatures of habit, and habit tells them that they should be outside playing with dragonji and pestering him for more ice and more nuzzles.
they wail their protests as foxxian tries to bring them back indoors. it is not easy.
they wail their protests as foxxian tries to bring them back indoors. it is not easy.
124
foxxian can grab two; it's getting the third that is tricky. babies are good at wriggling, and they consistently escape his grasp. the littlest one frees himself and scrambles outside, desperately making the clicking sound and crying out.
foxxian does not tear up. he doesn't.
foxxian does not tear up. he doesn't.
125
he catches the littlest one solely because the baby stopped to inspect something in the grass. once the baby is securely tucked under foxxian's arm, foxxian looks.
it's the other bracelet. it is bent and dirty after enduring rowdy fox-dragon baby teeth and a night left outdoors.
it's the other bracelet. it is bent and dirty after enduring rowdy fox-dragon baby teeth and a night left outdoors.
126
foxxian picks that up too, running his thumb over the blue and red gems.
he slips it into a pocket. "Alright, little one. Time for a nap," he says as he brings the youngest baby back to his siblings.
they'd just taken a nap. they fuss the entire time, unwilling to sleep.
he slips it into a pocket. "Alright, little one. Time for a nap," he says as he brings the youngest baby back to his siblings.
they'd just taken a nap. they fuss the entire time, unwilling to sleep.
127
dragonji returns in the early afternoon. the babies tumble out to greet him, chirping and clicking. they barrel into his lap, ecstatic.
foxxian watches them in fox form. it's easier to be like this. anything is better than enduring the way dragonji looked at his human self.
foxxian watches them in fox form. it's easier to be like this. anything is better than enduring the way dragonji looked at his human self.
128
dragonji brought something with him, as usual. he places the basket towards foxxian without looking at him.
foxxian slinks forward and sniffs the basket. inside is breadâfreshly-baked, too.
foxxian grunts in thanks as he takes an entire loaf out and sneaks away to eat it.
foxxian slinks forward and sniffs the basket. inside is breadâfreshly-baked, too.
foxxian grunts in thanks as he takes an entire loaf out and sneaks away to eat it.
129
their daily schedules go back to normal. dragonji visits daily and interacts more with the children. foxxian feels safe enough with him around that he takes naps while dragonji watches the babies.
madam yu isn't happy about the lack of an engagement.
madam yu isn't happy about the lack of an engagement.
130
emperor lxc has gone back to gusu, so madam yu no longer has anyone to throw insinuation after insinuation at about possibly marrying foxxian into the imperial lan dragon clan.
she tries with dragonji, but dragonji is good at making himself scarce if need be.
she tries with dragonji, but dragonji is good at making himself scarce if need be.
131
which leaves foxxian to bear the brunt of her frustration.
"You can't raise them by yourself," she keeps insisting. "There's a reason those of imperial blood stay in Gusu; only dragons can raise dragons."
"What do you want me to do, baby-trap Hanguang-Jun?" foxxian retorts.
"You can't raise them by yourself," she keeps insisting. "There's a reason those of imperial blood stay in Gusu; only dragons can raise dragons."
"What do you want me to do, baby-trap Hanguang-Jun?" foxxian retorts.
132
"If Emperor Lan does not have children, then any of yours could be the next ruler!" yzy grits out. "If the imperial family deems them unfit for the throne because they grew up outside of the Cloud Recesses, then it'll be your fault!"
foxxian tries to picture it. he can't.
foxxian tries to picture it. he can't.
133
his babies are still too small. his eldest still kneads his paws on the nearest object whenever he wants to suckle. his middle is asleep at any given moment. and his youngest still trips over his own tail.
"Think on it," yzy scowls. "This is their future. Don't be selfish."
"Think on it," yzy scowls. "This is their future. Don't be selfish."
134
foxxian doesn't think on it. his babies are still oh-so very small, and foxxian is more concerned with day-to-day concerns.
then it happens. he's busy dealing with laundry one day, and turns his back for just a moment. his children are playing outside, under a clear open sky.
then it happens. he's busy dealing with laundry one day, and turns his back for just a moment. his children are playing outside, under a clear open sky.
135
he doesn't see the hawk, because he didn't know to look for it. he'd never heard of anything eatingâor huntingâdragons.
the babies scream. there are sounds of a scramble. foxxian whips his head around andâthere's a hawk, flying away, with the middle baby clutched in its talons.
the babies scream. there are sounds of a scramble. foxxian whips his head around andâthere's a hawk, flying away, with the middle baby clutched in its talons.
136
the remaining two are on the ground, wailing after their sibling. the captured baby shrieks in terror as it is taken further, and further up into the sky.
foxxian hears his own scream like a distant ringing. he shifts into fox form and chases. he is fast.
but he can't fly.
foxxian hears his own scream like a distant ringing. he shifts into fox form and chases. he is fast.
but he can't fly.
137
the hawk is so far away that the fox-dragon baby's cries are getting harder to hear. foxxian's sobs tear through his throat. he can't do anything. his baby is too young; he won't be able to survive. all foxxian can do is watch, helpless, as his baby gets further and further awayâ
138
at first, foxxian mistakes the sound for an explosion. the force of it makes the ground shudder. thenâbroken roof tiles rain down as a huge shadow rushes by overhead.
a massive white dragon flies up to the sky. it gives a thunderous roar so loud that foxxian covers his ears.
a massive white dragon flies up to the sky. it gives a thunderous roar so loud that foxxian covers his ears.
139
the hawk is so far away, so visually small, and foxxian can't stop wiping tears out of his eyes; all he can do is watch the dragon and try to remember how to breathe.
people are running around, shouting. jyl rushes to foxxian's side with the two babies in her arms.
people are running around, shouting. jyl rushes to foxxian's side with the two babies in her arms.
140
she's saying something to himâbut all foxxian can focus on is the distant dragon and the now-too-far-to-be-seen hawk. the hawk is small and nimbleâand the dragon is large and lumbering.
the dragon weaves several times in the air, corralling the hawk with its own body.
the dragon weaves several times in the air, corralling the hawk with its own body.
141
foxxian can't tell what's going on, butâthe dragon then turns and heads back to them.
the closer the dragon gets, the more clearly foxxian can see that he doesn't have the baby with him. foxxian's stomach twists. he feels sick, like he's about to throw up. he can't breathe.
the closer the dragon gets, the more clearly foxxian can see that he doesn't have the baby with him. foxxian's stomach twists. he feels sick, like he's about to throw up. he can't breathe.
142
his baby is gone. foxxian can't even cry through the shock. his baby is gone; the dragon was too late. neither of them could save their little one.
foxxian's vision is starting to fade. he sways on his feet as the dragon approaches. he feels jc stand behind him, supporting him.
foxxian's vision is starting to fade. he sways on his feet as the dragon approaches. he feels jc stand behind him, supporting him.
143
the dragon lands in front of foxxian, talons scraping against the wooden walkway. it extends its neck until its nose is almost touching foxxian's head. it opens its mouth, andâ
âand a wet, saliva-drenched, feather-covered fox-dragon baby slides into foxxan's arms.
âand a wet, saliva-drenched, feather-covered fox-dragon baby slides into foxxan's arms.
144
foxxian cries out in relief and cradles the baby close, uncaring that he is getting dragon saliva all over himself. the babyâwho, just moments prior, was actually pretty comfy being held in his father's mouth and being soothed by throat-clicksâautomatically starts to cry as well.
145
foxxian takes the time to inspect his baby's body. aside from shallow cuts where the hawk's talons had gripped him, the baby is fine. there is some blood on him, but there is too much to be from his scrapes. that, and the broken feathers, are enough proof of the hawk's fate.
146
jyl gently deposits the two other babies in foxxian's arms, and foxxian bursts into tears. he sinks to the ground, hugging his children.
"Thank you," he chokes, nuzzling each baby. "Thank you, thank you."
dragonji is back in human form. he stands quietly in front of foxxian.
"Thank you," he chokes, nuzzling each baby. "Thank you, thank you."
dragonji is back in human form. he stands quietly in front of foxxian.
147
"There is no need to thank me," dragonji murmurs. "Everyone is safe."
somehow that makes foxxian cry harder. he smothers the babies in kisses and whispers, "I love you so much," to each of them.
jyl hugs him. jc pets each baby as if to reassure himself that they're still there.
somehow that makes foxxian cry harder. he smothers the babies in kisses and whispers, "I love you so much," to each of them.
jyl hugs him. jc pets each baby as if to reassure himself that they're still there.
148
the good thing about babies is that they tend to recover quickly; after getting his wounds cleaned and bandaged, the middle baby is more than happy to go play with his siblings.
meanwhile, foxxian is walking on eggshells. he's afraid to even blink, lest he miss something vital.
meanwhile, foxxian is walking on eggshells. he's afraid to even blink, lest he miss something vital.
149
dragonji stays, because it's his usual visit time. he plays with the children, wary of the middle one's injuries, and sends glances foxxian's way.
it's probably because foxxian is in human form. foxxian forgot to turn into a fox for the visit, but right now he doesn't care.
it's probably because foxxian is in human form. foxxian forgot to turn into a fox for the visit, but right now he doesn't care.
150
(cw: death, gore(?))
near the end of the visit, dragonji speaks. "Wei Wuxian. Are you well?"
no. foxxian is not well. his baby almost got taken away, killed, and eaten. if it weren't for dragonji, their baby could have now been a small, broken carcass being torn apart by hawks.
near the end of the visit, dragonji speaks. "Wei Wuxian. Are you well?"
no. foxxian is not well. his baby almost got taken away, killed, and eaten. if it weren't for dragonji, their baby could have now been a small, broken carcass being torn apart by hawks.
151
foxxian shudders. "I'm fine," he says automatically.
dragonji's eyebrows furrow. "You are in your head. Do not dwell on what-ifs. The children are safe and well."
easy for dragonji to say. dragonji wasn't helpless. dragonji can still do something if this happens again.
dragonji's eyebrows furrow. "You are in your head. Do not dwell on what-ifs. The children are safe and well."
easy for dragonji to say. dragonji wasn't helpless. dragonji can still do something if this happens again.
152
he doesn't register dragonji talking to him until a hand gently grips his chin and tilts his head up.
"Listen to me." dragonji is very close, and his eyes are very golden. "Whatever you're imagining did not happen. Our baby is here, and he's fine. You are not to blame for this."
"Listen to me." dragonji is very close, and his eyes are very golden. "Whatever you're imagining did not happen. Our baby is here, and he's fine. You are not to blame for this."
153
"If not me, then who?" foxxian croaks around the tears in his throat. "If you weren't hereâ"
"Stop." dragonji gives foxxian's chin a brief shake. "I was here. I'm still here. As are you. We're not going to let anything happen to the children. They are fine."
"Stop." dragonji gives foxxian's chin a brief shake. "I was here. I'm still here. As are you. We're not going to let anything happen to the children. They are fine."
154
foxxian's hands fly up to grasp dragonji's arm; it's the first time he has touched him since their argument about the gift bracelets. "Can you please stay?" he begs. "At least for tonight? The childrenâI'm afraidâ"
the look in dragonji's eyes shift. "You want me to stay?"
the look in dragonji's eyes shift. "You want me to stay?"
155
"Yes." foxxian clutches dragonji's sleeve. "A least for one night. Please. I do not know if I canâ"
"I will stay," dragonji says with a resolution that leaves no room for further questions.
foxxian slumps forward. "Thank you," he breathes. "Gods, I can't repay you."
"I will stay," dragonji says with a resolution that leaves no room for further questions.
foxxian slumps forward. "Thank you," he breathes. "Gods, I can't repay you."
156
"There is no repayment," dragonji's voice is a low rumble as he guides foxxian and the babies into foxxian's bedroom.
foxxian gets ready for bed through sheer muscle memory. give the babies a bath, dry them, tuck them in, and clean himself up.
foxxian gets ready for bed through sheer muscle memory. give the babies a bath, dry them, tuck them in, and clean himself up.
157
it's shocking how easily dragonji fits himself into the routine. his hands join foxxian's to help wash their babies, and he wordlessly hands foxxian towels afterwards. as foxxian tucks in one baby, dragonji is tucking in another and making his usual clicking sound to them.
158
the only time dragonji steps aside is when foxxian is tending to himself. he sits on the bed and watches the babies as foxxian bathes, dresses, and combs his hair.
they silently switch off, with foxxian watching the babies as dragonji washes up for the night.
they silently switch off, with foxxian watching the babies as dragonji washes up for the night.
159
by the time dragonji is done, foxxian has tucked himself into his usual place on his bed, curled around his babies. but he can't sleep, not when he could still so very clearly see his child being carried away by an aerial predator.
dragonji sits on the bed. "Wei Wuxian. Sleep."
dragonji sits on the bed. "Wei Wuxian. Sleep."
160
"It's Wei Ying," foxxian says without thought.
a pause. "Very well. Wei Ying. Sleep."
foxxian looks at their babiesâtheir fast-asleep, cuddle-piled babies. he wants to stay up. he wants to watch their little bodies rise and fall with each breath.
a pause. "Very well. Wei Ying. Sleep."
foxxian looks at their babiesâtheir fast-asleep, cuddle-piled babies. he wants to stay up. he wants to watch their little bodies rise and fall with each breath.
161
the weight on the bed shifts. dragonji is closeâso close that his cool breath stirs foxxian's hair as he speaks.
"Wei Ying," he says, immeasurably soft, "Go to sleep. I will watch over you and our children."
foxxian blinks. yawns.
"Wei Ying," he says, immeasurably soft, "Go to sleep. I will watch over you and our children."
foxxian blinks. yawns.
162
he is tired. the babies are fast asleep. everything is warm. the scent of all three babies is soothingâand, surprisingly, so is the new dragon scent nearby.
"You never told me your name," foxxian mumbles as he lays his head down on his pillow.
"You never told me your name," foxxian mumbles as he lays his head down on his pillow.
163
dragonji doesn't respond, and foxxian thinks that he didn't hear him. foxxian's eyes close; his exhaustion starts to take over.
right before he slips into unconsciousness, he thinks he hears an answer:
"You may call me Lan Zhan."
right before he slips into unconsciousness, he thinks he hears an answer:
"You may call me Lan Zhan."
164
the next morning, foxxian wakes up aloneâwith only a note on the bed with him that reads:
"Our children are fed and with me. We will stay nearby. Rest as long as you need.
Lan Wangji."
foxxian stares at the note. oh.
/oh./
right. dragonji had stayed for the night.
"Our children are fed and with me. We will stay nearby. Rest as long as you need.
Lan Wangji."
foxxian stares at the note. oh.
/oh./
right. dragonji had stayed for the night.
165
there is a tray of food on the nightstand, still warm. foxxian eats it, dresses, and heads outside.
dragonji is in dragon form outside, his long body coiled in a wide circle around their babies. at the sound of foxxian exiting the room, all four of them turn to look at him.
dragonji is in dragon form outside, his long body coiled in a wide circle around their babies. at the sound of foxxian exiting the room, all four of them turn to look at him.
166
the babies squeal and scramble over each other to reach him. the middle one lags behind a little due to his bandages, but he catches up.
foxxian sits down to let them crawl into his lap. "Good morning, baobei," he croons to each one, then looks at dragonji. "And to you, too."
foxxian sits down to let them crawl into his lap. "Good morning, baobei," he croons to each one, then looks at dragonji. "And to you, too."
167
dragonji stand up and shifts back into his human form. "Good morning," he says. "Did you rest well?"
foxxian nods. usually he's in his fox form by now and there would be no need to talk, but now he has to put in the effort. "How are the children?"
foxxian nods. usually he's in his fox form by now and there would be no need to talk, but now he has to put in the effort. "How are the children?"
168
"They are doing well," dragonji replies. he pauses. "I am trying to teach them how to breathe ice."
foxxian's hands still over his babies.
"For self-defense," dragonji hurries to explain. "I thought it would do them good to know what they're capable of."
foxxian's hands still over his babies.
"For self-defense," dragonji hurries to explain. "I thought it would do them good to know what they're capable of."
169
it somehow has never occurred to foxxian that his children could have inherited more of their dragon father's features. he has always seen them more like himselfâfoxes, except longer, with horns on their heads and the ability to fly.
if they can breathe ice, then that'sâgood.
if they can breathe ice, then that'sâgood.
170
that's good. thatâthat means they can defend themselves. they can give frostbite to whoever tries to hurt them, or at least surprise them enough to get away.
"How is that going?" foxxian croaks.
dragonji glances at their babies. "They are," another pause, "learning."
"How is that going?" foxxian croaks.
dragonji glances at their babies. "They are," another pause, "learning."
171
"May I see?" foxxian asks.
"Of course," dragonji nods. "But feel free to cover your ears if need be."
cover his ears? foxxian doesn't understand why, until dragonji shifts back into dragon form, clicks at their children to get their attention, and breathes a small pile of snow.
"Of course," dragonji nods. "But feel free to cover your ears if need be."
cover his ears? foxxian doesn't understand why, until dragonji shifts back into dragon form, clicks at their children to get their attention, and breathes a small pile of snow.
172
the babies see their father breathing ice. they visibly perk up, tails wagging eagerly. they take deep breaths, arch their necks, open their mouths, andâ
âyell.
not scream. yell. it is a controlled, steady stream of three baby voices vocalizing on three different chords.
âyell.
not scream. yell. it is a controlled, steady stream of three baby voices vocalizing on three different chords.
173
"It may be some time before they learn how to breathe without vocalizing," dragonji can barely be heard above the sound of three babies yelling. "They are trying their best."
as if foxxian didn't already know that. his sensitive ears hurt a little, but he bears through it.
as if foxxian didn't already know that. his sensitive ears hurt a little, but he bears through it.
174
eventually, frost starts to appear on the ground in front of the eldest fox-dragon baby. it melts immediately, but it is there nonetheless.
the eldest chirrups and looks up at dragonji.
dragonji nods at it. "Well done."
the youngest is still screaming down at its own toes.
the eldest chirrups and looks up at dragonji.
dragonji nods at it. "Well done."
the youngest is still screaming down at its own toes.
175
"When do dragon babies typically learn how to breathe ice?" foxxian asks above the sounds of the remaining two babies yelling.
"Within weeks of birth," dragonji replies.
weeks. the three babies are already six months old.
foxxian swallows hard.
"Within weeks of birth," dragonji replies.
weeks. the three babies are already six months old.
foxxian swallows hard.
176
the middle baby soon gives up, too distracted by its bandages to focus. the youngest baby unexpectedly sneezes out snowflakes, which dragonji counts as breathing ice. as a reward, dragonji breathes a snowdrift for them to play in.
they look⌠very happy to be dragons.
they look⌠very happy to be dragons.
177
foxxian and dragonji stand a respectful distance from each other as they watch their children play. neither of them say anything.
how much differently could yesterday have played out, foxxian wonders, if the children knew how to breathe iceâif they knew how to be dragons.
how much differently could yesterday have played out, foxxian wonders, if the children knew how to breathe iceâif they knew how to be dragons.
178
how many times had madam yu emphasized how vital it is that the babies be raised among dragons? how many times had foxxian denied them their nature because he wants to stay in the only home he has ever known?
a lump is growing in his throat. he clears it with a cough.
a lump is growing in his throat. he clears it with a cough.
179
"Wei Ying. Stop." dragonji's voice cuts through the fog of foxxian's mind like ice shards. "Your mind is wandering. Speculations are only speculations."
foxxian's laugh sounds watery. "You don't know that."
foxxian's laugh sounds watery. "You don't know that."
180
"I don't," dragonji admits. "But I do know what is and what isn't. The babies are safe, healthy, and happy. Everything else can happen at its own pace."
foxxian rubs at his eyes. "Do you think the children would have been safer and happier in Gusu?"
dragonji goes silent.
foxxian rubs at his eyes. "Do you think the children would have been safer and happier in Gusu?"
dragonji goes silent.
181
"The answer is yes, isn't it." foxxian laughs again, pressing the palms of his hands to his eyes. "I'm so stupid. I should have reached out the moment I knew what they were. What was I thinking? I can't raise dragonsâ"
"They are foxes, too," dragonji interjects.
"They are foxes, too," dragonji interjects.
182
"Foxes aren't hard to take care of," foxxian chokes. ah, he's crying. how embarrassing. "Just give us something soft and something to pounce on and let us scream every now and then. You would have figured it out."
"I wouldn't have," dragonji insists.
"I wouldn't have," dragonji insists.
183
"There is not much information available on foxes, aside from old legends," dragonji continues. "And even those are exaggerated. I wouldn't know myth from truth."
foxxian sniffles and wipes his face. "You've been doing research on foxes?"
dragonji goes silent again.
foxxian sniffles and wipes his face. "You've been doing research on foxes?"
dragonji goes silent again.
184
"Have you?" foxxian scoots closer to him. "Since when? Since you heard about our children?" he pauses, thinking. "Or⌠have you been looking for me ever since our first encounter when weâ"
dragonji turns on his heel and walks away. "It is noon. I will get us our midday meals."
dragonji turns on his heel and walks away. "It is noon. I will get us our midday meals."
185
cw: lactation
foxxian really wants to tease dragonji further, but his babies are also getting hungry. he shifts to fox form to let them nurse.
by the time dragonji returns with the food, the babies are all latched on, happily suckling.
foxxian really wants to tease dragonji further, but his babies are also getting hungry. he shifts to fox form to let them nurse.
by the time dragonji returns with the food, the babies are all latched on, happily suckling.
186
dragonji carefully sets out a plate in front of foxxian and scoops him bite-sized pieces of rice and meat with his chopsticks. foxxian gives a grateful yip and eats.
this is quite nice, he thinks. like a family meal.
the babies, with their small bellies, finish eating first.
this is quite nice, he thinks. like a family meal.
the babies, with their small bellies, finish eating first.
187
they toddle over to dragonji, crawling over him. the youngest nuzzles his hand, smearing milk all over his fingers.
dragonji takes out a handkerchief and patiently wipes their faces. "Settle down," he murmurs. "It is almost naptime. Do not get overly excited."
dragonji takes out a handkerchief and patiently wipes their faces. "Settle down," he murmurs. "It is almost naptime. Do not get overly excited."
188
the babies get overly excited, as expected. dragonji still makes them go to sleep on time.
with all three babies fed and fast asleep, foxxian shifts back to human form. he finishes the rest of his soup as dragonji pulls a letter from his sleeve and begins silently reading it.
with all three babies fed and fast asleep, foxxian shifts back to human form. he finishes the rest of his soup as dragonji pulls a letter from his sleeve and begins silently reading it.
189
foxxian knows it's probably a crime to read imperial letters. alas, foxes are nosy by nature, and he can't help scooting himself closer to peer over dragonji's shoulder.
dragonji angles the letter so that foxxian can read it. "It's from my family. They want to see the children."
dragonji angles the letter so that foxxian can read it. "It's from my family. They want to see the children."
190
foxxian freezes. the imperial family wants to⌠see the children? but they are still so little, and foxxian doesn't know what to pack for such a trip. hell, he doesn't even have any outfit suitable for royal company. the lan dragons are going to be disappointed when they see him.
191
"It will be an informal meeting," dragonji reassures him. "They understand that you are protective. We will return to Lotus Pier afterwards."
foxxian chews on his bottom lip. that's also another issue; he's no longer certain that lotus pier is the ideal home for the babies.
foxxian chews on his bottom lip. that's also another issue; he's no longer certain that lotus pier is the ideal home for the babies.
192
jc and jyl love the babies, but foxxian would be blind if he claims that the jiangs fully accept them. the babies' imperial bloodline makes the jiangs nervous. wherever the babies are, the imperial lan dragons are sure to keep watch.
foxxian can understand the jiang's caution.
foxxian can understand the jiang's caution.
193
foxxian takes a deep breath. it is too early to be making decisions. he can take the babies to the cloud recesses for a visit andâsee where things go from there.
"Alright," he sighs. "When do we leave?"
----------
"Alright," he sighs. "When do we leave?"
----------
194
on the day of the trip, the babies are ecstatic. they can sense a change in the way their parents are acting, and repeatedly get underfoot while foxxian and dragonji are trying to pack.
"This feels like a lot." foxxian lifts up the bags. "Are you sure you can carry these?"
"This feels like a lot." foxxian lifts up the bags. "Are you sure you can carry these?"
195
dragonjiâwho is currently in dragon form and twisted like a pretzel as he puts saddlebags on himselfânods and gingerly takes the bags from foxxian.
jc and jyl are there to send them off. jyl hugs foxxian and wishes him well. jc demands they bring back souvenirs.
jc and jyl are there to send them off. jyl hugs foxxian and wishes him well. jc demands they bring back souvenirs.
196
getting onto dragonji's back is awkward; foxxian has never touched so much of him before. foxxian winces every time he has to kick off of dragonji's scales or yank at his mane to get himself seated.
the babies are already nestled in between their father's antlers, chirping.
the babies are already nestled in between their father's antlers, chirping.
197
dragonji takes off gently, circling slowly up into the sky. foxxian makes the mistake of peeking at the ground. he clutches dragonji's mane. falling from trees already hurts enough; he doesn't want to think about falling from this height.
dragonji gives a low throaty rumble.
dragonji gives a low throaty rumble.
198
"Sorry," foxxian whispers, then forces himself to loosen his grip.
things go smoothly until they go above the clouds. the youngest baby shrieks with joy upon seeing the fluffy clouds. he bounces to the edge of his father's mane.
and tries to step onto a cloud.
things go smoothly until they go above the clouds. the youngest baby shrieks with joy upon seeing the fluffy clouds. he bounces to the edge of his father's mane.
and tries to step onto a cloud.
199
foxxian screams, but the baby's instincts take over; he falls through the air for a horrifying second before he twists around and starts flying.
foxxian collapses against dragonji's mane, groaning. he probably aged a decade right then and there.
foxxian collapses against dragonji's mane, groaning. he probably aged a decade right then and there.
200
the trip to gusu takes two days on horseback, but it takes only half a day on dragonback. during that time, foxxian learns to appreciate his babies' flying skills.
they have never been up this high before, and are excited beyond their little minds. one tries to eat a cloud.
they have never been up this high before, and are excited beyond their little minds. one tries to eat a cloud.
201
foxxian doesn't have much idea what the ancestral home of dragons looks like, but the moment he lays eyes on the distant white jade buildings on top of a high mountain, he suddenly wants to burrow into dragonji's mane and never come back out.
the babies fly ahead, curious.
the babies fly ahead, curious.
202
they are not curious for long. slowly, dragons emerge from around the mountain or within the white jade buildings. their scales bear different shades of white and blueâalthough none of them can match dragonji's opalescent white scales.
the babies dart back to foxxian's side.
the babies dart back to foxxian's side.
203
the dragons approach, circling around dragonji, vocalizing in huffs and clicks. dragonji huffs back at them and returns their greetings.
the babies, who are trying to bury themselves down foxxian's shirt, peek out at the sound of the clicks.
the babies, who are trying to bury themselves down foxxian's shirt, peek out at the sound of the clicks.
204
meanwhile, foxxian isn't sure if he has blinked; how many others can claim to have seen even one dragon, much less a dozen? they are massive, and foxxian can feel the wind from them flying so close.
the dragons stay with them as dragonji lands in a marble courtyard.
the dragons stay with them as dragonji lands in a marble courtyard.
205
there is a man in the courtyardâthe only lan who is in human form. foxxian slides, ungracefully, off of dragonji's neck; it is difficult to do much with a shirtful of fox-dragon babies.
"Wangji," the man greets once dragonji is also human. "You are back. Is this your mate?"
"Wangji," the man greets once dragonji is also human. "You are back. Is this your mate?"
206
foxxian pauses in the middle of trying to fish three stubborn babies out from inside his shirt. he holds his breath, waiting for dragonji's answer.
"This," dragonji glances at him, "is Wei Ying."
the man waits, as if expecting more. "I⌠see," he finally says.
"This," dragonji glances at him, "is Wei Ying."
the man waits, as if expecting more. "I⌠see," he finally says.
207
the man strokes his beard. "The Cloud Recesses welcomes you, Wei Ying. I am Lan Qiren, uncle to His Majesty and the Second Prince."
foxxian bows. from within his shirt, one of the babies growls.
"Oh my gosh, my apologies," foxxian sputters. "They're just a little nervous."
foxxian bows. from within his shirt, one of the babies growls.
"Oh my gosh, my apologies," foxxian sputters. "They're just a little nervous."
208
"No apologies needed. It is understandable," lqr says, although he's frowning. "You must be tired. We'll have another bed set up in Wangji's jingshi, then you may retire for the day."
foxxian bows again, then sticks close as dragonji leads them down a path.
foxxian bows again, then sticks close as dragonji leads them down a path.
209
the cloud recesses is much larger than lotus pier. the buildings are clearly designed with dragons in mind; they are massive, with ceilings that seem to scrape the skies, and paths so wide that they could fit ten horse-carts side by side.
foxxian feels incredibly tiny.
foxxian feels incredibly tiny.
210
the babies, braver now that they're alone, tumbles out from foxxian's shirt to go explore. they fly aroundâlicking, nibbling, and bonking their heads on whatever is closest to them.
"Is that normal?" foxxian asks weakly.
dragonji considers this for a while. "For the moment."
"Is that normal?" foxxian asks weakly.
dragonji considers this for a while. "For the moment."
211
foxxian gives a snort-chuckle at that. dragonji blinks at the sound, then turns his head away, the tips of his ears pink.
the jingshi is in a secluded part of the cloud recesses and is surprisingly small. human-sized. the interior smells comfortingly of dragonji.
the jingshi is in a secluded part of the cloud recesses and is surprisingly small. human-sized. the interior smells comfortingly of dragonji.
212
the babies make a beeline for dragonji's neatly-made, wrinkle-free bed. within seconds, they mess it up, wriggling their way through the soft fabric and tracking dusty pawprints all over the pristine sheets.
"Oh." foxxian's shoulders sag. "Sorry. I can, um, I can wash that."
"Oh." foxxian's shoulders sag. "Sorry. I can, um, I can wash that."
213
"No need." dragonji plucks each baby off of the bed. "I'll bathe them."
foxxian waits for him to pull out a bathtub or step into another room. instead, dragonji takes them outside.
"There's a Cold Spring nearby," dragonji explains on the way there. "It will be good for them."
foxxian waits for him to pull out a bathtub or step into another room. instead, dragonji takes them outside.
"There's a Cold Spring nearby," dragonji explains on the way there. "It will be good for them."
214
the babies squeal their distress as dragonji carries them into the cold springs.
"The cold is not harming them," dragonji reassures foxxian as he thoroughly washes each baby.
foxxian stays on the shore, trying not to think about how see-through dragonji's wet robes are.
"The cold is not harming them," dragonji reassures foxxian as he thoroughly washes each baby.
foxxian stays on the shore, trying not to think about how see-through dragonji's wet robes are.
215
dragons are not shapeshifters at heart. they may change their form, but parts of them will always remain dragon. parts of dragonji's shoulders retain their scales, shining opalescent and blending seamlessly into human skin at dragonji's chest.
foxxian swallows carefully.
foxxian swallows carefully.
216
he does not remember much of their coupling; it's mostly sensations: the scent of sandalwood, the heat of another body, the maddening caress of lips along his neck.
foxxian wonders if he'd kissed those scales, gazed into those eyes, or dug his fingers into those shoulders.
foxxian wonders if he'd kissed those scales, gazed into those eyes, or dug his fingers into those shoulders.
217
it's difficult to imagine doing so now. dragonji is a good partner, but they are notâclose. their children tie them together, and little else. if they were left alone together, foxxian imagines it would be awkward.
foxxian hugs his knees and forces himself to watch the babies.
foxxian hugs his knees and forces himself to watch the babies.
218
the youngest, rotund one isâpredictablyâa baba's boy. he finishes his bath with minimal grumbling and gets deposited on the banks by dragonji. after shaking himself out, the baby waddles over to foxxian and, still wet, crawls into foxxian's lap for miserable cuddles.
219
the eldest is next, most likely because the middle one has bandages and will require more time to wash. the baby wails his grievance to the universe as dragonji patiently explains to him why he needs to retract his little fox claws from dragonji's robe.
220
cw: slight blood, no major injuries
baby claws are sharp and unused. they scrape harmlessly across dragonji's scales, but dig into his human skin. dragonji doesn't make a sound, not even when tiny spots of red appear on his chest.
eventually, the eldest is clean.
baby claws are sharp and unused. they scrape harmlessly across dragonji's scales, but dig into his human skin. dragonji doesn't make a sound, not even when tiny spots of red appear on his chest.
eventually, the eldest is clean.
221
cw: slight blood, no major injuries
the middle is no better, influenced by his brother's bad behavior. he too fights against his father, shrieking as if dragonji is trying to drown him. he leaves tiny claw marks on dragonji's skinâjust enough to bleed a little.
the middle is no better, influenced by his brother's bad behavior. he too fights against his father, shrieking as if dragonji is trying to drown him. he leaves tiny claw marks on dragonji's skinâjust enough to bleed a little.
222
"There we are," dragonji sighs as he hands the middle baby to foxxian and hauls himself out of the spring.
foxxian towels the baby off, hyper aware that dragonji is undoing his robes. his back is turned, so foxxian can't see anything, but he's still *undressing*.
foxxian towels the baby off, hyper aware that dragonji is undoing his robes. his back is turned, so foxxian can't see anything, but he's still *undressing*.
223
foxxian clears his throat before speaking. "Any permanent damage?"
"No," dragonji replies. "Just some scrapes."
foxxian ties the end of the middle baby's bandages into a small bow. "I have some leftover bandages here, if you need them. Turn around."
"No," dragonji replies. "Just some scrapes."
foxxian ties the end of the middle baby's bandages into a small bow. "I have some leftover bandages here, if you need them. Turn around."
224
dragonji stays silent for the longest time.
the stillness drags on.
just as foxxian is about to cave to embarrassment and throw the roll of bandages at dragonji's head and tell him to tend to his own wounds, dragonji makes the smallest, shortest "Mn," sound and turns around.
the stillness drags on.
just as foxxian is about to cave to embarrassment and throw the roll of bandages at dragonji's head and tell him to tend to his own wounds, dragonji makes the smallest, shortest "Mn," sound and turns around.
225
foxxian's breath stops short.
the cold springs naturally glow a soft turquoise. the light reflects off of dragonji's skin and scales. the droplets of water cling to his body and hair like tiny, liquid jewels.
he looks heaven-crafted, and foxxian almost fears touching him.
the cold springs naturally glow a soft turquoise. the light reflects off of dragonji's skin and scales. the droplets of water cling to his body and hair like tiny, liquid jewels.
he looks heaven-crafted, and foxxian almost fears touching him.
226
but he makes himself. makes himself look down at dragonji's chest. makes himself concentrate on the constellations of scratches and claw imprints in dragonji's skin. makes himself cover them with bandages.
dragonji is very near. foxxian can feel his breath on his own forehead.
dragonji is very near. foxxian can feel his breath on his own forehead.
227
when the bandages are used up, foxxian dares to raise his head.
it is a mistake. the moment foxxian locks eyes with dragonji, he can't look away. he almost doesn't blink. all he can see is gold, gold, looking back at him.
dragonji's face doesn't move, but his breaths shake.
it is a mistake. the moment foxxian locks eyes with dragonji, he can't look away. he almost doesn't blink. all he can see is gold, gold, looking back at him.
dragonji's face doesn't move, but his breaths shake.
228
distantly, foxxian wonders if it was like this, before. if dragonji had once looked at him like it would tear him apart to look away. if time had stood still for them both.
foxxian exhales shakily. dragonji's lips part, barely, almost imperceivably.
foxxian exhales shakily. dragonji's lips part, barely, almost imperceivably.
229
foxxian is not aware of leaning in, of tilting his head and closing his eyes. he almost doesn't feel the hand on his waist, or the soft exhale on his mouth.
their noses brush, almost too lightly. one of foxxian's hands reaches up to cup dragonji's cheek. their lips touchâ
their noses brush, almost too lightly. one of foxxian's hands reaches up to cup dragonji's cheek. their lips touchâ
230
tiny high-pitched growls break out behind them, making dragonji and foxxian whip their heads around.
the fox-dragon babies, now dry and fluffy and bored, have decided to play tug-of-war with their father's boots. they snarl and yank a boot around, dragging it through the dirt.
the fox-dragon babies, now dry and fluffy and bored, have decided to play tug-of-war with their father's boots. they snarl and yank a boot around, dragging it through the dirt.
231
"Ah! No, no, no!" foxxian dives after the babies. dragonji's hand slips off of his waist. "Your father still needs that, you little rascalsâ"
the babies flee, dragging their stolen prize with them. foxxian has to chase them around the cold spring.
the babies flee, dragging their stolen prize with them. foxxian has to chase them around the cold spring.
232
when they loop back around, dragonji is finishing up tying a dry robe layer together. he easily stops the babies in their tracks with a well-placed foot.
foxxian confiscates the boot back from them. he winces; it's all scuffed and muddy.
"It's alright." dragonji takes the boot.
foxxian confiscates the boot back from them. he winces; it's all scuffed and muddy.
"It's alright." dragonji takes the boot.
233
with the boots safely secured and adrenaline fading, a quiet awkwardness settles. dragonji puts his boots back on as foxxian busies himself with rounding up the babies.
what was that, back there? they had almostâalmostâ
foxxian feels his ears heat up. oh, heavens.
what was that, back there? they had almostâalmostâ
foxxian feels his ears heat up. oh, heavens.
234
what was he thinking? he and dragonji aren'tâand they were so close toâand the babies were RIGHT THERE, andâ
foxxian buries his face in his youngest's fur, earning him a questioning 'mmrp?' sound from the baby.
he should apologize. yes. that would be the right thing to do.
foxxian buries his face in his youngest's fur, earning him a questioning 'mmrp?' sound from the baby.
he should apologize. yes. that would be the right thing to do.
235
foxxian takes a deep breath and raises his head.
before he can get a single word out, dragonji says, "It's time for supper. I will go get our meals. Do you remember the way back to the jingshi?"
"Uh." foxxian closes his mouth. "Um. Yeah. Yeah, I do. I can find my way."
before he can get a single word out, dragonji says, "It's time for supper. I will go get our meals. Do you remember the way back to the jingshi?"
"Uh." foxxian closes his mouth. "Um. Yeah. Yeah, I do. I can find my way."
236
the moment dragonji leaves, foxxian realizes that he, maybe, doesn't remember the way back to the jingshi. it is no big deal; at the very worst, he will just have to ask someone for directions.
he sets off in the direction he thinks they came from with an armful of babies.
he sets off in the direction he thinks they came from with an armful of babies.
237
he's lost within minutes. the cloud recesses buildings are tall and their paths are wide, but everything looks the same. there is also no signage; the lans have no reason to put directions in their own home.
foxxian exhales deeply and looks for someone to ask directions.
foxxian exhales deeply and looks for someone to ask directions.
238
he spots a white-robed lan walking by in front of themâand in human form, too. foxxian perks up, and jogs over.
"Ah, pardon me, Your Lordship," he doesn't know what to address the lan, but he figures 'your lordship' is a safe bet. "Could you please direct me toâ"
the lan turns.
"Ah, pardon me, Your Lordship," he doesn't know what to address the lan, but he figures 'your lordship' is a safe bet. "Could you please direct me toâ"
the lan turns.
239
lqr looks evenly at him. "Good evening, Wei Ying."
"Oh," foxxian sputters. "You're Lan ZhâHanguang-Jun's uncle."
"Hm." lqr's brows furrow. "It is late."
"I know." foxxian laughs nervously, then stops when lqr's frown deepens. "I, um, I'm a bit lost, actually."
"Oh," foxxian sputters. "You're Lan ZhâHanguang-Jun's uncle."
"Hm." lqr's brows furrow. "It is late."
"I know." foxxian laughs nervously, then stops when lqr's frown deepens. "I, um, I'm a bit lost, actually."
240
lqr strokes his beard. "Did Wangji not accompany you back to the jingshi?"
"No, he went to get our supper." foxxian wrings his hands together. "A-anyways, have a good evening. I should get going."
"Wait," lqr sighs, then walks over to him. "I will show you the way."
"No, he went to get our supper." foxxian wrings his hands together. "A-anyways, have a good evening. I should get going."
"Wait," lqr sighs, then walks over to him. "I will show you the way."
241
the walk is very awkward. foxxian is off-balance thanks to the babies all clinging to one side of his body, and lqr keeps his eyes forward.
"I trust Wangji is treating you well," lqr says.
foxxian heaves one of the babies onto his shoulder. "Oh, yes, he is. Very much so."
"I trust Wangji is treating you well," lqr says.
foxxian heaves one of the babies onto his shoulder. "Oh, yes, he is. Very much so."
242
"Hm." lqr still doesn't look at him. "Do the children need anything?"
"Um," foxxian thinks about it. "Not for now. I wouldn't say no to extra towels and blankets, though."
"I will arrange for more to be brought to you," lqr replies.
"Um," foxxian thinks about it. "Not for now. I wouldn't say no to extra towels and blankets, though."
"I will arrange for more to be brought to you," lqr replies.
243
they fall back to silence. the babies, now just a little more curious than cautious, begin to peek out from behind foxxian. one of them gives a tiny warning growl.
lqr responds with clicking sounds from his throat.
the growl immediately stops as three pairs of ears perk up.
lqr responds with clicking sounds from his throat.
the growl immediately stops as three pairs of ears perk up.
244
foxxian seizes the chance. "Would you like to hold them?" he blurts out.
lqr nods. "Yes." he holds out his hands.
carefully, foxxian deposits each baby into lqr's arms, watching their reactions the whole time. the babies are still cautious, but not scared. they chirp at lqr.
lqr nods. "Yes." he holds out his hands.
carefully, foxxian deposits each baby into lqr's arms, watching their reactions the whole time. the babies are still cautious, but not scared. they chirp at lqr.
245
lqr's gaze softens as he clicks more at them, which the babies eagerly echo back at him. the smallest of smiles appears on lqr's lips as he gently touches the youngest one's ears.
"I see Wangji has been spending time with them," he says. he says it like he had not expected it.
"I see Wangji has been spending time with them," he says. he says it like he had not expected it.
246
"Hanguang-Jun is selfless and attentive," foxxian carefully answers. "I have no reason to keep the children from him."
lqr doesn't respond to that. he strokes each baby from their nose to their tail, inspecting.
he stops at the middle one's bandages. "What happened here?"
lqr doesn't respond to that. he strokes each baby from their nose to their tail, inspecting.
he stops at the middle one's bandages. "What happened here?"
247
foxxian winces. he cannot bring himself to lie. "I wasn't careful enough," he admits. "A hawk got him. Hanguang-Jun had to rescue him."
lqr presses ever-so-gently on the bandages. the wounds underneath are almost fully healed, and there is no pain.
the baby licks lqr's wrist.
lqr presses ever-so-gently on the bandages. the wounds underneath are almost fully healed, and there is no pain.
the baby licks lqr's wrist.
248
"You must have been terrified," lqr says to foxxian as he scratches under the middle baby's chin. "He is so small."
foxxian's eyes sting. "Yeah," he chokes as tears cloud his vision. "It wasâyeah."
lqr mercifully doesn't look at him and continues walking alongside him.
foxxian's eyes sting. "Yeah," he chokes as tears cloud his vision. "It wasâyeah."
lqr mercifully doesn't look at him and continues walking alongside him.
249
when they arrive at the jingshi, dragonji is already there, searching around the perimeter of the house. when he spots them, he hurries over.
"Shufu," he bows to lqr. "Thank you for escorting Wei Ying back."
"It is of no trouble," lqr replies.
"Shufu," he bows to lqr. "Thank you for escorting Wei Ying back."
"It is of no trouble," lqr replies.
250
the next few minutes are a bit chaotic. the babies have decided that they Like this new dragon person who makes the soothing click noises and gives the nice scritches and they Do Not want him to leave and they will Wail Loudly at any attempts to remove them from his person.
251
by the time foxxian and dragonji get the babies off of lqr, lqr's robes are mussed and all three babies are crying.
"My apologies, shufu," dragonji says as the youngest bites his nose in defiance. "It is late and they are tired."
"It is late," lqr agrees. "I will leave you be."
"My apologies, shufu," dragonji says as the youngest bites his nose in defiance. "It is late and they are tired."
"It is late," lqr agrees. "I will leave you be."
252
the babies quiet down once they're brought into the jingshi. three little noses twitch at the smell of hot food on the table.
"Did shufu give you any trouble?" dragonji asks as he sets the babies down.
"Ah? No." foxxian also releases a baby. "He wasânice. Surprisingly."
"Did shufu give you any trouble?" dragonji asks as he sets the babies down.
"Ah? No." foxxian also releases a baby. "He wasânice. Surprisingly."
253
"Why is it surprising?" dragonji asks.
"BecauseâŚ" foxxian awkwardly gestures at both of them and the babies. "Surely your shufu must have had bigger plans for you: a career supporting the emperor, a life of imperial duty, maybe even a betrothal to someone from a good family."
"BecauseâŚ" foxxian awkwardly gestures at both of them and the babies. "Surely your shufu must have had bigger plans for you: a career supporting the emperor, a life of imperial duty, maybe even a betrothal to someone from a good family."
254
dragonji's eyebrows are starting to furrow, so foxxian quickly clarifies, "I'm not saying you can't do any of those! You can still support your brother andâand marry some heir to a noble house or something. But you didn't plan toâŚ" he gestures again at everyone in the room.
255
"Shufu did wish for me to serve as advisor to my brother," dragonji says slowly, "but he did not impose any expectation on me. It is of my own will that I serve my brother, as isâany relationship choice I make."
"Oh." foxxian laughs uneasily. "Well. That's. good to hear."
"Oh." foxxian laughs uneasily. "Well. That's. good to hear."
256
they settle down to eat supper. the babies are not yet old enough to eat anything other than milk and a little bit of broth. they whine and paw at their parents until they give each of them a spoonful of their soup.
foxxian chews on his chopsticks as he glances at dragonji.
foxxian chews on his chopsticks as he glances at dragonji.
257
he can't stop thinking about what almost happened back at the cold spring. how close they were. had been.
dragonji's breath is always slightly cold, but his lips wereâisâwarm. he is warm, the kind of warm that makes foxxian want to curl up into and sleep, surrounded by him.
dragonji's breath is always slightly cold, but his lips wereâisâwarm. he is warm, the kind of warm that makes foxxian want to curl up into and sleep, surrounded by him.
258
cw: lactation
the babies are starting to fuss, and foxxian is done with his supper, so he shifts into fox form and jumps onto the spare bed made for him. he circles several times, stomping the bedsheets down, before flopping onto his side.
the babies crowd his belly, nursing.
the babies are starting to fuss, and foxxian is done with his supper, so he shifts into fox form and jumps onto the spare bed made for him. he circles several times, stomping the bedsheets down, before flopping onto his side.
the babies crowd his belly, nursing.
259
dragonji clears the table and goes to prepare a bath. foxxian idly watches him bring in bucket after bucket full of hot water.
once the bathtub is filled, dragonji stands a respectful distance away and quietly watches foxxian and their children.
once the bathtub is filled, dragonji stands a respectful distance away and quietly watches foxxian and their children.
260
the babies are sleepy when their bellies are full of warm milk, and they are quick to pass out. foxxian does a full-body stretch before hopping off of the bed and turning human.
dragonji gives him a nod. "I've drawn you a bath."
foxxian eyes the steaming bathtub appreciatively.
dragonji gives him a nod. "I've drawn you a bath."
foxxian eyes the steaming bathtub appreciatively.
261
"Thank you," foxxian says. he feels the impulseâalmost too brief to be registeredâto dart forward and kiss dragonji's cheek.
he shakes his head and goes behind the screen to bathe. when he steps into the bathtub, he lets out a satisfied moan.
dragonji coughs lightly.
he shakes his head and goes behind the screen to bathe. when he steps into the bathtub, he lets out a satisfied moan.
dragonji coughs lightly.
262
the bathtubs in the cloud recesses are big, and foxxian can sink down until the water level is just under his nose. it doesn't hurt in the least that dragonji has thoughtfully sprinkled safflowers and quince fruit slices in the water. everything smells heavenly.
263
foxxian isn't aware that he fell asleep until he hears someone whispering his name.
the water has cooled down, but not so much that it is no longer warm. he blinks drowsily and turns to look at the source of the sound.
dragonji is standing next to the bathtub, his eyes closed.
the water has cooled down, but not so much that it is no longer warm. he blinks drowsily and turns to look at the source of the sound.
dragonji is standing next to the bathtub, his eyes closed.
264
"Wei Ying," dragonji whispers again, blindly reaching out until his hand touches the bathtub. he grips the edge. "Wake up. It's getting late."
foxxian's sleep-addled mind is not sure why he is being woken up to be told that he needs to go to sleep. he doesn't want to move.
foxxian's sleep-addled mind is not sure why he is being woken up to be told that he needs to go to sleep. he doesn't want to move.
265
dragonji's hand moves along the edge of the bathtub until it touches foxxian's hair. "Wei Ying," he calls again as he cautiously opens his eyes, his gaze locked solely onto foxxian's face.
foxxian gives him a lazy, sleepy smile. "Hello," he mumbles. "Good bath."
foxxian gives him a lazy, sleepy smile. "Hello," he mumbles. "Good bath."
266
"Mn." dragonji turns away and holds a towel out.
"Why so shy, Hanguang-Jun?" foxxian sighs as he takes the towel. "There's no part of me you haven't seen."
dragonji's ears turn crimson. "Wei Ying!" he whisper-scolds.
"Am I wrong?" foxxian teases.
"Why so shy, Hanguang-Jun?" foxxian sighs as he takes the towel. "There's no part of me you haven't seen."
dragonji's ears turn crimson. "Wei Ying!" he whisper-scolds.
"Am I wrong?" foxxian teases.
267
dragonji doesn't reply. instead, he gets another towel for foxxian's hair.
when foxxian stands up to step out of the bathtub, dragonji looks away again, his hands clenched into tight fists at his side.
humming, foxxian wraps himself in the big towel and wipes his face on it.
when foxxian stands up to step out of the bathtub, dragonji looks away again, his hands clenched into tight fists at his side.
humming, foxxian wraps himself in the big towel and wipes his face on it.
268
the robes dragonji gives him are soft and made of thick silk. foxxian coos at the texture as he dresses.
he emerges from behind the screen to join dragonji in looking at their children. the babies are fast asleep on the spare bed, sprawled out, taking up most of the space.
he emerges from behind the screen to join dragonji in looking at their children. the babies are fast asleep on the spare bed, sprawled out, taking up most of the space.
269
it usually takes a lot more fussing and effort to get the babies to sleep, yet⌠here they are. asleep.
foxxian exhales slowly. "Usually they try to fight it more."
"Mn," dragonji agrees. "We should leave them be."
"Good idea," foxxian says.
foxxian exhales slowly. "Usually they try to fight it more."
"Mn," dragonji agrees. "We should leave them be."
"Good idea," foxxian says.
270
the silence that follows is suffocating. foxxian is *very* aware that there is only one bed leftâand it's dragonji's own bed.
he sucks in a slow breath. "So, I'm just going toâ"
"I'll going to take theâ" dragonji says at the same time.
they both stop.
he sucks in a slow breath. "So, I'm just going toâ"
"I'll going to take theâ" dragonji says at the same time.
they both stop.
271
"Sorry, you were saying?" foxxian asks.
dragonji clears his throat. "I can sleep on the floor. You may take the bed."
oh thatâthat isn't what foxxian was going to suggest at all. far from it, actually.
"I'll take the floor," foxxian insists. "I can't take your bed."
dragonji clears his throat. "I can sleep on the floor. You may take the bed."
oh thatâthat isn't what foxxian was going to suggest at all. far from it, actually.
"I'll take the floor," foxxian insists. "I can't take your bed."