In coaching, one of the biggest mistakes you can make is to decide...
Steve Magness@stevemagness
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Oct 15, 2025
~2 min read
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In coaching, one of the biggest mistakes you can make is to decide too early who’s got it and who doesn’t.
The reality? We have no idea.
Potential is revealed over time. It's incredible hard to predict.
And your belief might be the thing that helps it show up.
The reality? We have no idea.
Potential is revealed over time. It's incredible hard to predict.
And your belief might be the thing that helps it show up.
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Decades of research back this up.
When we decide who’s talented, gifted, or promising, we start behaving differently toward them.
We give more feedback, more patience, more chances.
And over time, those expectations quietly shape outcomes.
When we decide who’s talented, gifted, or promising, we start behaving differently toward them.
We give more feedback, more patience, more chances.
And over time, those expectations quietly shape outcomes.
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Psychologists Robert Rosenthal and Lenore Jacobson showed this in a landmark 1968 study.
They told teachers that random students were “intellectual bloomers.”
By the end of the year, those students outperformed their peers on IQ tests.
The only problem? They were randomly labeled that...
They told teachers that random students were “intellectual bloomers.”
By the end of the year, those students outperformed their peers on IQ tests.
The only problem? They were randomly labeled that...
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This became known as the Pygmalion Effect: the idea that belief itself can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
When someone expects you to grow, you often do.
When they don’t, you tend not to.
It’s not magic. It’s the accumulation of micro-behaviors driven by perception.
When someone expects you to grow, you often do.
When they don’t, you tend not to.
It’s not magic. It’s the accumulation of micro-behaviors driven by perception.
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Teachers in the study didn’t consciously favor the “bloomers.”
They just gave them more eye contact, more encouragement, and more detailed feedback.
Subtle signals of belief that compound over time.
The same dynamic happens in workplaces, teams, and families every day.
They just gave them more eye contact, more encouragement, and more detailed feedback.
Subtle signals of belief that compound over time.
The same dynamic happens in workplaces, teams, and families every day.
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That’s why early judgment can be so dangerous.
Label someone as average, and you unknowingly limit your own effort to help them improve.
You stop looking for evidence of growth.
Your expectations quietly become their environment.
Label someone as average, and you unknowingly limit your own effort to help them improve.
You stop looking for evidence of growth.
Your expectations quietly become their environment.
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On the flip side, belief doesn’t guarantee success, but it creates space for it.
It gives people permission to try, to fail, and to stretch without fear of being written off.
And that psychological safety often precedes breakthrough.
You can’t force potential, but you can nurture it.
It gives people permission to try, to fail, and to stretch without fear of being written off.
And that psychological safety often precedes breakthrough.
You can’t force potential, but you can nurture it.
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The best leaders, teachers, and mentors understand this.
They stay curious instead of certain.
They recognize that growth isn’t linear, and talent rarely announces itself early.
Their job isn’t to judge. It’s to create the conditions where others can surprise them.
They stay curious instead of certain.
They recognize that growth isn’t linear, and talent rarely announces itself early.
Their job isn’t to judge. It’s to create the conditions where others can surprise them.
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In coaching, I’ve seen this play out so many times.
Athletes that on paper had “no shot” go on to become conference scorers, NCAA qualifiers, difference makers.
Why? They were given a shot and got coaching that gave them an opportunity to grow.
Athletes that on paper had “no shot” go on to become conference scorers, NCAA qualifiers, difference makers.
Why? They were given a shot and got coaching that gave them an opportunity to grow.
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You never know someones potential.
Just look at all of the major sports "sure thing" busts" or the 7th round stars in professional sports.
Our job as parents, teachers, and coaches is to do teach. To give people a shot. To provide the tools to get them closer to their potential.
That requires being open, to let curiosity drive the ship instead of judgment.
Because the moment you decide who someone is, you stop seeing who they could become.
Just look at all of the major sports "sure thing" busts" or the 7th round stars in professional sports.
Our job as parents, teachers, and coaches is to do teach. To give people a shot. To provide the tools to get them closer to their potential.
That requires being open, to let curiosity drive the ship instead of judgment.
Because the moment you decide who someone is, you stop seeing who they could become.