We love to say athletes are driven by one of two things: Love...
Steve Magness@stevemagness
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Aug 14, 2025
~2 min read
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We love to say athletes are driven by one of two things:
Love winning.
Or hate losing.
Kobe Bryant saw it differently.
“I’m neither. I play to figure things out.”
Love winning.
Or hate losing.
Kobe Bryant saw it differently.
“I’m neither. I play to figure things out.”
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Kobe explained:
If you play with a fear of failure, you’re primed to fold.
If you play with “I just want to win,” you live in fear of what happens if you don’t.
Both leave you at the mercy of outcomes, things you can’t fully control.
"But if you find common ground in the middle, in the center, then it doesn’t matter. You’re unfazed. You stay in the moment. Stay connected to it. And not feel anything other than what’s in front of you. I try to be dead center.”
If you play with a fear of failure, you’re primed to fold.
If you play with “I just want to win,” you live in fear of what happens if you don’t.
Both leave you at the mercy of outcomes, things you can’t fully control.
"But if you find common ground in the middle, in the center, then it doesn’t matter. You’re unfazed. You stay in the moment. Stay connected to it. And not feel anything other than what’s in front of you. I try to be dead center.”
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Tom House—a legendary throwing coach who’s worked with Nolan Ryan, Randy Johnson, Tom Brady, Drew Brees—noticed something similar.
“They’re addicted to the process. Winning is a byproduct.”
They stay in the process better than anyone.
Even wins only pull them out for moments.
“They’re addicted to the process. Winning is a byproduct.”
They stay in the process better than anyone.
Even wins only pull them out for moments.
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This is harder than it sounds.
Success has gravity...it pulls you toward outcomes, accolades, and the need to prove yourself again and again.
The best resist that pull.
They point their obsession at mastery, not at collecting trophies.
And ironically, that’s what keeps them winning for so long.
Success has gravity...it pulls you toward outcomes, accolades, and the need to prove yourself again and again.
The best resist that pull.
They point their obsession at mastery, not at collecting trophies.
And ironically, that’s what keeps them winning for so long.
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Research backs this up.
In education, mastery-oriented students—those focused on learning and comprehension rather than comparison—get better grades, not because they’re chasing grades, but because they seek out challenges.
In sport, a meta-analysis found process-oriented goals had a large effect on performance.
Outcome goals? Little to no effect.
In education, mastery-oriented students—those focused on learning and comprehension rather than comparison—get better grades, not because they’re chasing grades, but because they seek out challenges.
In sport, a meta-analysis found process-oriented goals had a large effect on performance.
Outcome goals? Little to no effect.
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Why does mastery work?
It activates your approach system without triggering avoidance.
You take on challenges for their own sake, not because you’re afraid of what happens if you fail.
That frees you from the pressure and judgment that so often sabotage performance.
It activates your approach system without triggering avoidance.
You take on challenges for their own sake, not because you’re afraid of what happens if you fail.
That frees you from the pressure and judgment that so often sabotage performance.
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Kobe’s “dead center” mindset is a form of mastery.
He wasn’t there to prove his worth.
He was there to figure it out.
That orientation turns every game, every moment—good or bad—into feedback.
It’s all useful. Nothing is wasted.
He wasn’t there to prove his worth.
He was there to figure it out.
That orientation turns every game, every moment—good or bad—into feedback.
It’s all useful. Nothing is wasted.
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Fear and outcome obsession narrow your focus until all you see is the threat.
Mastery widens the lens.
You notice possibilities, solutions, and creative angles you’d otherwise miss.
And you can ride out the inevitable highs and lows without losing your footing.
Mastery widens the lens.
You notice possibilities, solutions, and creative angles you’d otherwise miss.
And you can ride out the inevitable highs and lows without losing your footing.
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This doesn’t mean you don’t care about winning.
It means you care about how you play more than what you get.
Because you know that if you get the process right, the results follow and even if they don’t, you’re still growing.
It means you care about how you play more than what you get.
Because you know that if you get the process right, the results follow and even if they don’t, you’re still growing.
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So take it from Kobe and the greatest throwers Tom House ever coached:
Don’t just love winning or hate losing.
Get addicted to figuring it out.
Anchor yourself in the process.
That’s where freedom—and sustainable excellence—live.
Don’t just love winning or hate losing.
Get addicted to figuring it out.
Anchor yourself in the process.
That’s where freedom—and sustainable excellence—live.
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