How to get rich (in business and life) Relationship wagers What...
Matt Schnuck@mattschnuck
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Jan 08, 2026
~3 min read
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How to get rich (in business and life)
Relationship wagers
What they are and the 3 most important ones:
Relationship wagers
What they are and the 3 most important ones:
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Relationship wagers are bets on people that create the possibility for deep personal relationships and rich business partnerships.
The best things in life come from compound interest...and that includes relationships.
The best things in life come from compound interest...and that includes relationships.
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Relationship riches emerge from 3 primary relationship wagers that compound over time.
Most people don’t think consciously about how these “bets” on people and connecting behaviors impact their relationships.
These are 3 wagers for a rich life:
Most people don’t think consciously about how these “bets” on people and connecting behaviors impact their relationships.
These are 3 wagers for a rich life:
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1. THE TRUST WAGER
When we meet someone new, an invisible choice must be made:
To trust or not?
When we meet someone new, an invisible choice must be made:
To trust or not?
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The Trust Wager states:
Assume someone is trustworthy until you have irrefutable evidence that they are not.
Assume someone is trustworthy until you have irrefutable evidence that they are not.
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The Trust Wager Upside:
Belief in others acts like a magnet, pulling people to a higher standard because good people won’t want to let you down.
Belief in others acts like a magnet, pulling people to a higher standard because good people won’t want to let you down.
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The Trust Wager Downside:
Know you will sometimes get burned.
Protect against this by starting small, never leaving yourself open to catastrophe.
Know you will sometimes get burned.
Protect against this by starting small, never leaving yourself open to catastrophe.
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In a business partnership, do not put irrecoverable cash at risk in an early relationship.
In a personal relationship, start with something small like sharing some low stakes personal details versus letting someone new watchover your kids.
In a personal relationship, start with something small like sharing some low stakes personal details versus letting someone new watchover your kids.
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If your trust is broken:
Differentiate broken trust due to incompetence from poor character.
If your trust is validated:
Increase the amount of exposure to worthy people over time.
Differentiate broken trust due to incompetence from poor character.
If your trust is validated:
Increase the amount of exposure to worthy people over time.
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2. THE VULNERABILITY WAGER
The best relationships have depth. Vulnerability creates depth. But someone has to go first.
The best relationships have depth. Vulnerability creates depth. But someone has to go first.
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The Vulnerability Wager states:
Accept the pain (cost) of being vulnerable. Being vulnerable first will inspire a high-character person to be vulnerable in return.
Accept the pain (cost) of being vulnerable. Being vulnerable first will inspire a high-character person to be vulnerable in return.
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The Vulnerability Wager Upside:
The pain of early vulnerability is far less than the massively fulfilling feelings of a deeper connection.
The pain of early vulnerability is far less than the massively fulfilling feelings of a deeper connection.
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The Vulnerability Wager Downside:
Vulnerability can be used against you by low-character people. If so, disengage and distance.
Your vulnerability may unintentionally hurt the other person.
But that’s recoverable because there is the third wager...
Vulnerability can be used against you by low-character people. If so, disengage and distance.
Your vulnerability may unintentionally hurt the other person.
But that’s recoverable because there is the third wager...
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3. THE REPAIR WAGER
Hurt feelings and conflict are not signs of a bad partnership. They are inevitable.
Unfortunately, most people do not know how to repair.
Hurt feelings and conflict are not signs of a bad partnership. They are inevitable.
Unfortunately, most people do not know how to repair.
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The Repair Wager states:
Bet on your ability to repair a relationship if a well-intended act of vulnerability leads to hurt feelings or conflict.
Bet on your ability to repair a relationship if a well-intended act of vulnerability leads to hurt feelings or conflict.
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The Repair Wager Upside:
Skillful repair can be learned.
A master of repair knows they can be incredibly open and vulnerable because they can lovingly get a relationship back on track with a good faith partner.
Skillful repair can be learned.
A master of repair knows they can be incredibly open and vulnerable because they can lovingly get a relationship back on track with a good faith partner.
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The Repair Wager Downside:
You will sometimes hurt some relationships.
Learn the principles of relationship repair:
You will sometimes hurt some relationships.
Learn the principles of relationship repair:
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-Fine-tune the essentials of great listening
-Ensure you can hear, accept and own the other’s pain you may cause to heal and move forward fully.
-Know you are judged on the impact you make, not your intentions.
-Ensure you can hear, accept and own the other’s pain you may cause to heal and move forward fully.
-Know you are judged on the impact you make, not your intentions.
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Great relationships are full-contact sports.
Conflict is inevitable.
Betrayal is guaranteed.
In the face of that, these three brave wagers, with skillful downside protection, unlock a rich life.
Conflict is inevitable.
Betrayal is guaranteed.
In the face of that, these three brave wagers, with skillful downside protection, unlock a rich life.
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“The quality of our relationships determines the quality of our lives.” - Esther Perel
Make the following wagers with skillful downside protection for a high-quality, rich life:
The Trust Wager
The Vulnerability Wager
The Repair Wager
Bet bold. Bet wisely.
Make the following wagers with skillful downside protection for a high-quality, rich life:
The Trust Wager
The Vulnerability Wager
The Repair Wager
Bet bold. Bet wisely.
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If you enjoyed this thread:
Follow me @mattschnuck for more threads on EQ, entrepreneurship, and the art and science of great relationships.
Follow me @mattschnuck for more threads on EQ, entrepreneurship, and the art and science of great relationships.
