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My wife and I recently started a monthly check-in ritual. It’s been incredible for our relationship. The Life Dinner:
I first came across the concept of the Life Dinner from entrepreneur Brad Feld. The idea is simple: A fixed monthly date to sit down for a meal with your partner to reflect on personal, professional, and relationship progress, challenges, and goals.
Over time, your life becomes increasingly hectic. After our son was born in May 2022, this fact was top-of-mind for both of us. It becomes easy to allow your relationship with your partner to sit on the back-burner while you deal with the more pressing fires of day-to-day life.
While this may seem ok in the short-term, it can easily lead to problems in the long-term. The Life Dinner is a thoughtful approach to keep your relationship thriving despite the time constraints and stresses of daily life.
A few specifics for conducting your own Life Dinner ritual: • Set a recurring monthly date • Pick a favorite spot, explore a new place, or cook a meal at home • If you don’t have time for a full meal, do it over a coffee or drink Make it a sacred monthly ritual.
Three areas to cover in discussion: • Personal • Professional • Relationship. Within each area, each person should have the floor to reflect on the prior month's progress and challenges, as well as forward-looking goals.
After each person has their time, you can discuss key items as a team. The goal is to give each person time to speak freely before opening it up for a joint discussion.
My wife and I love the Life Dinner because it creates a structure through which we can grow together. Since we had our son in May 2022, it's been a critical part of our "system" for ensuring we continue to grow together despite the chaos of having a newborn in the house.
If you're in a relationship, I'd encourage you to give the Life Dinner a shot. At worst, you get a nice meal together—but I'm guessing you'll get much more out of it than that! Follow me @SahilBloom for more and RT the first tweet to share it with others. <a target="_blank" href="https://twitter.com/SahilBloom/status/1643615338058207234" color="blue">x.com/SahilBloom/sta…</a>
One pushback is that you should just talk daily and not need a “system” for your relationship. If you’ve been married for years, have kids, and still find time for deeper discussions daily, more power to you. I don’t think that’s the norm, though—this would help most couples.
One other note: The Life Dinner isn’t intended to *replace* normal daily discussions and conversations. It’s silly to think that doing one means you aren’t talking daily. It’s just a way to guarantee these deeper, personal, 1-on-1 discussions are happening on a regular basis.
Also, if you feel the need to reply to people you don’t know with bad faith stuff like this, you should probably do some soul searching.
P.S. I write about topics related to growth, health, and wealth in my 2x weekly newsletter. Join 300,000+ others who receive it here! <a target="_blank" href="https://www.sahilbloom.com/newsletter" color="blue">sahilbloom.com/newsletter</a>
Here’s the original blog post from Brad Feld explaining the Life Dinner concept. Worth a read if you want to go deeper! <a target="_blank" href="https://feld.com/archives/2008/03/life-dinner/" color="blue">feld.com/archives/2008/…</a>
Anytime someone tries to draw me into an argument on Twitter, I have two options: A) Argue on Twitter B) Do literally anything else with my life Path B always wins out. 🫡🫡🫡
Here’s what happens most nights when my wife and I are trying to have a serious conversation. Hence, the need for the Life Dinner! 😂😂😂
