The impact of being raised by a narcissistic father:
Dr. Nicole LePera@Theholisticpsyc
38 views
Dec 25, 2024
1
The impact of being raised by a narcissistic father:
2
Being raised by a narcissist father means your father hasn’t fully matured emotionally. His main focus is: his own needs, the way he’s perceived by others, and being ‘respected‘ by his family.
He tends to confuse respect with obedience.
He tends to confuse respect with obedience.
3
It’s important to understand the narcissistic father is lacking: emotional regulation skills, conflict resolution skills, a sense of self, and the ability to attune to the emotions or perspectives of others.
4
Because of these emotional limits, he tends to easily become overstimulated. The overstimulation can manifest as: yelling/shaming, or sulking/giving the silent treatment. For those around him, this means walking on eggshells.
5
Growing up with a narcissistic father meant hearing:
- “nothing is ever good enough”
- “after all I’ve done for you!”
- “you’re difficult like your mother”
- “everyone here is against me”
- “you’re ungrateful”
- “guess I’m just a horrible father”
- “nothing is ever good enough”
- “after all I’ve done for you!”
- “you’re difficult like your mother”
- “everyone here is against me”
- “you’re ungrateful”
- “guess I’m just a horrible father”
6
He doesn’t see his children as individuals, they’re an extension of him. This creates a dynamic where he’s highly critical, demands perfection, and gives “tough love.” He tries to live through his child’s achievements to cover his own shame and inadequacy.
7
Children of narcissistic fathers learn early that he creates the entire mood of the home. This creates hypervigilance, or a chronic focus on other people’s changes in mood, tone, or behavior.
This is the start of their people pleasing pattern.
This is the start of their people pleasing pattern.
8
As adults, they carry an ‘invisible’ father wound.
The father wound manifests as:
- low self worth
- feelings of being a burden
- a core belief they must perform for love
- a pattern of dysfunctional relationships
- a belief we can (and should) “fix” others
The father wound manifests as:
- low self worth
- feelings of being a burden
- a core belief they must perform for love
- a pattern of dysfunctional relationships
- a belief we can (and should) “fix” others
9
- unhealthy anger (completely repressed, or short fused)
- people pleasing
- subconsciously seeking difficult or immature partners
- chronic depression or anxiety
- fear of being perceived
- people pleasing
- subconsciously seeking difficult or immature partners
- chronic depression or anxiety
- fear of being perceived
10
It’s important to know your father’s behavior and the way he treated you is a reflection of his internal world.
Please bookmark and share to anyone affected.
Please bookmark and share to anyone affected.
11
If you’re ready to heal my private community @selfhealerscirc opens Jan 2nd. We have experts on narcissism, trauma healing, and so much more!
Spaces do sell out. Learn more or get on the waitlist here; selfhealerscircle.com
Spaces do sell out. Learn more or get on the waitlist here; selfhealerscircle.com