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How to be more emotionally intelligent (without trying so hard) 🧵 for @threadapalooza

1. If you’re scared of feeling an emotion, you’re already in it.

2. Constantly trying to make sense of your emotions prevents you from hearing their wisdom.

3. Joy is the matriarch of a family of emotions. She won't come into your house if her children are not welcome.

4. If you can't welcome the emotion, welcome the resistance to it.

5. Ego is as much what you don’t think you are as what you think you are.

6. You can’t give or receive love fully if you’re constantly calculating what could go wrong.

7. You also cannot love fully unless you see that you are completely empowered. It is near impossible to love what you think oppresses you.

8. We often abandon ourselves in an attempt to prevent other people from abandoning us.

9. When your thinking is binary, fear is running the show.

10. The next time you’re in freeze or depression, notice how much of it is repressed or held back anger.

11. Anger in its purity is beautiful. Trying to change somebody, change their beliefs, be above them, dominate them, control them, scare them, push them away, or try to make them do anything – that is manipulation, not anger.

12. The next time you’re feeling anxious, notice how much of it is repressed or held back excitement.

13. People don’t want you to be perfect. What they want is to feel connected to you.

14. People who are exhausted all day are often in the habit of beating themselves up or telling themselves how they should be.

15. Endless self-criticism is usually a sign that you want to be seen as valuable rather than to be of value.

16. There is no way of getting it perfect. There is no complete, no finish line, no done. There is simply “What’s the next experiment?” There is only play.

17. If you can’t say “no” easily, you can’t be trusted.

18. - If it feels scary to say, it's important - If it feels scary to say, NOT saying it will hurt your connection - If it feels scary to say, NOT saying it prioritizes their imagined reaction over your truth

19. You can’t be accepted for who you are if you’re not showing up as who you are.