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Drag Post #1
Elissa 🥮 | yiling laozu apologist
@cerbykerby

today's short thought for #mermay is fisherman lwj fighting for his life and career because merman wwx keeps catching rides on his boat and stEALING HIS CATCHES.

Drag Post #2
Elissa 🥮 | yiling laozu apologist
@cerbykerby

for the longest time, lwj thought that reported sightings of mermaids were just hallucinations or embellished stories—until he briefly leaves his boat to have dinner on shore and returns to find a large, spiny merman on his boat, helping himself to lwj's catch of the day.

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Elissa 🥮 | yiling laozu apologist
@cerbykerby

at first, lwj thinks he's an intruder. then he thinks he's a mutilated human. there's no other way to explain the sharp fins and scales and claws on their person. until that person turns around to look at lwj with dark, inhuman eyes and a mouth full of fish.

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Elissa 🥮 | yiling laozu apologist
@cerbykerby

lwj never carries any weapon aside from a knife. he doesn't have a use for a gun out on the water. at that moment, he sorely regrets it. luckily, the light from lwj's flashlight blinds the creature and it wriggles its way across the deck before slipping back into the water.

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Elissa 🥮 | yiling laozu apologist
@cerbykerby

lwj is terrified. he tells himself that he is hallucinating. he goes for doctor check-ups. he visits a psychologist. nothing is out of the ordinary with him. his brother even offers to go with him out on the water. neither of them see anything.

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Elissa 🥮 | yiling laozu apologist
@cerbykerby

then, a week after lxc goes home and lwj convinces himself that he was just too tired, it happens again. this time, he is pulling in a net. when it spills open on deck, out spills the merman from before, who looks utterly ecstatic to be surrounded by so much caught fish.

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Elissa 🥮 | yiling laozu apologist
@cerbykerby

I can't find it but there's a video of two fisherman on a boat trying to toss a shark back into the ocean as the shark enthusiastically eats mouthfuls of fish and all I gotta say is that that is exactly how it goes down between fisherman lwj and merman wwx.

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Elissa 🥮 | yiling laozu apologist
@cerbykerby

merman wwx is so utterly riveted and distracted trying to shove as much fish into his mouth as possible that he pays zero mind to lwj struggling to get him back in the ocean. even as wwx is sliding back into the water, he's trying to grab as many fish as he can.

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Elissa 🥮 | yiling laozu apologist
@cerbykerby

and, well, that's just the start of lwj's troubles. whoever said that mermaids are elusive is a liar. every time something goes missing, or the boat starts acting funny, or lwj hears some strange noises, he KNOWS that it's that goddang merman.

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Elissa 🥮 | yiling laozu apologist
@cerbykerby

countless times, lwj finds him hauled out a ledge or deck, hitching a ride on the boat as lwj heads out to fishing grounds. countless times, lwj finds him tangled in the nets, because he knows the fish is trapped in there, and he knows lwj will set him free every time.

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Elissa 🥮 | yiling laozu apologist
@cerbykerby

lwj does not want to give in and feed him out of hopes that he would leave the fish alone. the beast seems like he wouldn't hesitate to take advantage of any attempts at bribery or negotiation. so. lwj has no choice. he has to live with this pest.

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Elissa 🥮 | yiling laozu apologist
@cerbykerby

he gets so used to it that, the next time lxc goes fishing with him, he completely forgets to warn his brother beforehand. needless to say, lxc freaks out an appropriate amount when he sees his brother defeatedly dragging a several-hundred-pound sea monster back into the water.

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Elissa 🥮 | yiling laozu apologist
@cerbykerby

lwj: xiong-zhang, take this broom lxc: oh! do we need something cleaned? lwj: no. when he appears, smack him with it lxc: .................... who? 🥹 wwx, pulling himself up onto the deck: 😈

Drag Post #14
Elissa 🥮 | yiling laozu apologist
@cerbykerby

despite the disturbance of the merman's presence, lwj—oddly—continues to make a profit off of his job. as it turns out, the merman figured out that if he drives schools of fish directly into lwj's net, he has *more* fish to shove into his mouth as lwj drags him off the boat.

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Elissa 🥮 | yiling laozu apologist
@cerbykerby

wwx has even learned that lwj has a item that is better and sharper than any tooth or claw; he has watched lwj use it to prepare fish meals for himself. lwj will typically throw fish remains overboard, where wwx eagerly waits for free food.

Drag Post #16
Elissa 🥮 | yiling laozu apologist
@cerbykerby

at some point, wwx learns that if he herds bigger and better fish into lwj's nets, then naturally he will get bigger and better fish scraps that evening. it goes well... sometimes. occasionally, he herds an endangered species into lwj's nets and lwj has to let the creature go.

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Elissa 🥮 | yiling laozu apologist
@cerbykerby

wwx was Very upset the first time lwj released a shark and made his thoughts known by screeching very loudly. lwj quickly put an end to that by lighting a torch and waiting it near the water, scaring wwx off. wwx deliberately nets himself twice the next day, as revenge.

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Elissa 🥮 | yiling laozu apologist
@cerbykerby

it also doesn't take lwj long to realize that the merman is rather intelligent (even if said merman continuously chooses to act like a spoiled, feral beast). he's not going to complain about the better catches, even if he has to deal with wwx helping himself more often.

Drag Post #19
Elissa 🥮 | yiling laozu apologist
@cerbykerby

and besides, lwj isn't blind to the numerous scars on the merman's body. this isn't the merman's first close encounter with humans. when feral beasts wander too close to humans, then their caution goes down and they could wind up hurt.

Drag Post #20
Elissa 🥮 | yiling laozu apologist
@cerbykerby

lwj only uses fire as a visual threat when he *really* doesn't want the merman near a catch or for the merman to leave. he would never actually hurt the creature—especially since he's hunting in its home. he's not sure if the same could be said for anyone else.