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today's thought is: secret idol lwj who lives a double life through one simple rule—speak as little as possible while he's in his idol persona, and never sing when he's just livin his civilian life.

"elissa, is this inspired by hannah—" YES IT'S INSPIRED BY HANNAH MONTANA. AND WHAT OF IT.

lwj never intended to become famous. he'd started taking singing lessons shortly after his mother passed; lxc had convinced their uncle that lwj, who is so short with his words and emotions, that singing would be a good emotional outlet. who could've known he would be good at it?

despite lwj's growing success in the music industry, lqr is determined for his nephew to have a normal life. lwj's idol persona, hgj, is all glitter and silk and masks—while lwj himself abides by his family's rules on dressing modestly. it's the perfect arrangement.

hgj is notorious for refusing interviews. the few he has given are all conducted with him typing up his answers on a projected screen or with his manager repeating his answers for him. on the other hand, lwj absolutely refuses to sing—which is quite easy. he has few friends.

everything works out just fine—lwj gets to live both lives at once and develop his singing career alongside his academic. everything is fine. until, one day, lwj overhears wwx playing a hgj song on his phone speaker and lwj walks straight into a pillar.

to lwj's relief (and torture), wwx is not a HUGE fan. he's a fan, yes, but he doesn't gush about hgj with his friends or show up to school in a hgj t-shirt. the most lwj catches are occasional glimpses of his album cover on wwx's phone whenever wwx puts his earbuds in.

lwj is d y i n g to know what wwx thinks of his music, but there is no way he can bring up the topic naturally. he and wwx aren't even friends; he has tattled on wwx several times for sneaking alcohol to school and supervised his afterschool detentions.

lwj, watching wwx bop his head lightly with his earbuds in: oh god is he listening to my music wwx, full-on disassociating and on his 23rd repeat of caramelldansen:

wwx, when he finally notices lwj: oh!! hello, lan zhan!! *takes one earbud out* earbud, faintly: o-o-oa-oa aa

lwj does not have many friends, and even less reason to be singing, but he finds a reason when he learns that wwx is spending his birthday alone. so lwj stops by his apartment with a small cake, a present, and a card.

wwx is pleasantly surprised and happily accuses lwj of secretly liking him—which is close enough to the truth that it makes lwj's ears flush. wwx invites him into the apartment and eagerly lights a candle on the small cake. lwj thinks he's supposed to sing 'happy birthday' now.

lwj really, really does not want to sing. at the same time, he really, really does not want wwx to have a birthday without anyone to sing him happy birthday. so, he sings. it is the worst, most monotone performance of his life. yet the way wwx smiles is everything.

wwx gives him a tight hug and a thank-you before making a wish and blowing out his candle. after sharing a slice of cake, lwj leaves for home after another hug from wwx. he goes to lie on the floor in the middle of his room and not speak for a good 20 minutes.

he wants DESPERATELY to sing properly for wwx, but he can't do so without exposing his entire career and ruining all his hard work in keeping his lives separate. when he finally wills himself to get up, he aggressively composes 'wangxian' on his piano.

i just think it would be very funny for wwx to be a fan of hgj's music—but not to the point where he's gushing about him 24/7, so lwj is Constantly guessing. lwj: omg he's listening to my latest album. omg what does that face expression mean?? 😭😭 wwx, about to sneeze:

at the same time, when wwx *does* talk about hgj, lwj never expects it so it ALWAYS catches him off-guard. the most of his face hgj shows is the lower half, so teaser images for upcoming concerts and albums often focus on his throat, jaw, and collarbones—for the thirst value.

one day—completely out of the blue—wwx is scrolling on his phone and says out loud, "God, I want to lick his jawline." lwj looks over, recognizes his own concert promo image, and accidentally faceplants on the ground.

omfg what if one day wwx manages to win a pair of hgj tickets in a raffle and the first thing he does is offer the second ticket to lwj. lwj wants to scream into a pillow. it's like a DATE, but lwj can't GO because it's HIS CONCERT 😭😭😭

lwj declines the invite with great reluctance. wwx shrugs as if he expected it—oof, that hurts—and says, "No worries! I guess I'll ask Wen Ning." lwj does not want him to ask wn, but he can't say anything about it either. does he mope in bed after school? yes, yes he does.